Atharv's Own Blog

You can visit Atharv's Blog at this link. This blog will list everything about Atharv. His activities, mannerisms, milestones and even his monthly snaps. So you could even see him growing...

See you at http://atharvs.blogspot.com/
then :)

Cheerio...

We joyfully announce the birth of our first child

Dear All,

In our lives has come a time
When our wishes have come true
We are delighted to let you know
Our home has come some one new!

We were blessed with a baby boy on November 22nd 2008 at 5:20 am at the Swedish Medical Hospital. The baby and his mom are doing fine.

At his birth, Atharv weighted 8.6 lbs and measured 21.5 inches long. Pictures at the link below, taken on Day3 at the hospital.

http://www.our365.com/NewbornPortraits/BabyDetail.aspx?birthid=a5d4a745-8d83-48e1-9312-7c72f823baab

In anticipation of your blessings to the new born.

Proud Parents,
Abhinav & Deepti

Remembering Dadaji - Shri Atul Krishna Sharan

Sadly enough I never knew my Dadaji was such a great person, until Piyush Bhaiya (see below) wrote all that about him. As a kid, for me he was a good friend, always ready to play with me and my Chachaji's sons and my cousins; Ankur, Ankit. He would tell us stories and engage us in his conversations.

He would sometimes accompany the three of us to school, when Ankur and I would walk while Ankit would perch at the back seat of at the front bar of his cycle. Perhaps one of the reason why I never felt ashamed to ride a cycle, even when I working as a lecturer; where as all my school friends had long back started riding scooty's / cars; was that I had seen my Dadaji riding a cycle all his life. This thought must have occurred to me; when we could ride one at his age, why couldn't I ride one at my age?

At Dusshara, Dadaji would bring us toy teer-kaman (bow and arrow) to play with. Once Ankit who was barely 5 that time, aimed and by mistake shot that wooden toy arrow at Dadaji's eye. My daddy who was passing by and saw that, suddenly came into a complete state of shock and was almost on the verge to loose his temper, but on the other hand there was not a word of anger in Dadaji's voice, not a single brow on my his forehead. He simply lay down for a while, treating his eye. And in the next 15 minutes got back to his feet and started playing with us again, as if nothing had happened in the middle.

I always heard my daddy say in admiration, of how Dadaji managed to raise his kids; how by Dadaji's inspiration and motivation; 4 of his kids ultimately went on to study at one of the most reputed engineering and medical colleges of their time. All that happening within the limited means that he had.

Everyone used to appreciate his stamina and health conscience attitude where he could walk for miles together, without feeling the need to hire a rickshaw or an auto. My parents always realized that Dadaji was light years ahead of them in terms of the strength he possessed and drew immense inspiration to be like Dadaji.

Dadaji was not only good at his work; he was a great cook too. Several years after Dadaji moved to Allahabad, and once came to visit us; on one occasion he tough us how to prepare post-partum ladoos. They were full of rich dry fruits, black pepper and tons of ghee; and undoubted the most different and best ladoos I had ever tasted before.

The last time I had the fortune to seek Dadaji blessings was in my marriage. In spite of his poor health condition, Dadaji stayed awake through out the marriage, and gave his last blessings to me and Abhinav; as we got prepared to leave for my new home.

May his sole rest in peace.

My paternal cousin - Piyush (Bua's ji son) wrote this when my Dadaji left this earth for his heavenly abode on November 5th this year.
-----------------------------------------------

Dear Brothers & Sisters,
This is a tribute to our beloved Nanaji.
Please share any memories you have of him, with all of us.
Love,
Piyush
-----------------------------------------------
My maternal Grandfather, Shri Atul Krishna Sharan left for his heavenly abode, at the age of 94.

He was a model of simplicity and righteous living.

A large part of his career was spent as a News Editor, at the All India Radio (AIR).
In the later part of his life, he also acquired a LLB law degree, and worked in the offices of the noted jurist, LM Singhvi.

Not many people know that Nanaji was an expert at many languages. Apart from Hindi, English, Urdu and Punjabi, he also knew French and Russian.

I have fond memories of the love he showered on us as children. When we used to visit Ghaziabad, he would stand outside the gate waiting for us to arrive from the station. When we arrived, he would lift us in his lap, and hug us.

He led a very simple life. He never liked wasteful expenditure. He was happy with whatever he had, and led a life of contentment. He did not like to throw anything away, and would try to reuse and recycle everything. He never craved for materialistic possessions.
His life was based on a spirit of sacrifice.

He used to do Shirshasana and other Yogic exercises regularly. His regular Yoga exercises, moderation in eating, temperance in outlook, and contentment of heart were the secrets of his long and healthy life.
As children, we loved to see him do Shirshasana, where he would show us how to balance himself on his head.

He was a pure vegetarian, and only ate Sattvik food.

He was a very sweet and simple man, whom you always found smiling. I never saw him angry, or shout at anyone. He would take life's ups and downs with equanimity, without losing his cool. He was a straightforward person, who bore no ill-will towards anyone.

He liked to keep himself updated on current affairs, and would read the newspapers regularly. When we used to go to his room, we would usually find him reading something, wearing his characteristic dhoti.

One of his interests was to listen to radio channels from around the world.
He was very fond of his beloved radio.

His blessings will always be with us.
May God give Peace and Liberation to his soul.
________________________________________________________________________

Points to consider when searching for Pediatrician

PEDIATRICIAN
1. Is the doc taking new patients?
2. Is the doc BOARD specialized?
3. Is the doc a general or a specialize one (in some form of child treatment?)
4. Does the doc see the baby after his birth in the hospital or do we need to bring him to the clinic for the first visit?
5. Is he interested in meeting parents before accepting the child to his list? (to make sure the parents aren’t over cautious or of the careless category?)
6. Is there a nurse who handles questions over the phone during office hours?
7. How about after hours? Is there an after-hours clinic, or would we need to go to an emergency room?
8. Who will my child see if our doctor is not there?
9. What hospital or hospitals can the doctor refer patients to? (where does the doc have privileges to see the baby)
10. Does doc offer to see baby in evenings or weekend hours or holidays? Where?
11. Children’s hospital?
12. Swedish hospital?
13. Hospital closest to our new Family Home?
14. Any other specific place?
15. Does the doc come himself or allows the Emergency doc give orders for the baby; and then come himself the next morning?
16. What does the doc think about immunizations?
17. What is the average waiting time?
18. What is the doc philosophy? – antibiotics and medicines are the only cure or does the doc believe in natural treatments / natural healing by the body?
19. How can I know whether baby too also RH +ive?
20. Breast pumps – which ones suggested – Medalla / Aveno / others?
21. (can adults and kids be given the same nasal spray – or are there different potencies)
22. DPT(diphtheria, polio, whooping cough, tetanus) (4th, 6th, 9th, 12th months and then 5 years)
23. Does DPT include Polio – Also in India all kids below 5 need to get vaccinated
24. Diapers / Wipers – which brands suit babies best?

Considerations for parents –
ο Is the doc new or old in practice
ο Which school does the doc belong to? US / India?
ο Do you want a doctor who treats only children (a pediatrician)?
ο Would you like a doctor who treats the whole family?
ο Do you want a doctor who is close to your home or work place?
ο Do you need to choose a doctor from a list given by your insurance provider?
ο Do you want a doctor who?
ο Would you or your child prefer a man or a woman doctor?
ο Does your child need a specialist?
ο Do you want a doctor who speaks a certain language?

List of Things To Buy For New Born & Would-Be-Mom

1) Prefer Baby Bag over Diaper Bag. Baby Bags are bigger.
2) Maconium time ke liye cream
3) Pure Cotton caps (topi)
4) A to D / Boudreaux’s Butt Paste – Diaper Rash ointment
5) Sore Nips – Bandages etc. (Lancare Danish Wool Pads – no need to wash before 30 days. Best recommended for sore nips – available at (Swedish-Health Building $27)
6)
7) Rectal Thermometer – should buy one. + Vaseline
8) Sleeping bag for babies
9) Bottle Purifier
10) Syringe + catheter?? India or US?
11) alcohol wipes - to wipe of thermometer
12) petroleum jelly - before inserting into rectus
13) http://www.babywrappers.com/ one is $34. Try one and get another only if this suits.
14) Spanx Belly Band / - Ugg Boots / - Birkenstocks
15) Co-sleeper?
16) Double lock safety pins – mainly for diaper
17) Sleeping Bag (cocoons)
18) Baby Snow suits (http://yellow-turtle.com/store/index.html?action=browse&CategoryNum=31116550861057202&sortby=sale&showall=y ) – has warm stuff
19) Instant formula
20) Mineral water for instant water
21) Enfamil – yellow wala – its regular for babies 0-12 months
22) 1v. Vinly sheet for changing station
23) Laundry bag – for baby’s tiny clothes
24) Boppy Cotton Slipcover (Boppy pillow ka cover)
25) Double Headrest (as in near car seat section, to keep head in position)
26) Post partum support
27) Amazon se CDs - Womb CD - Music as baby hears when in womb
28) Witch hazel
29) Poise Pads (are wider and are suggested for incontinency) / Super maxi - not P1
30) For same purpose:
1. Tucks pads – for cleaning mom and babes bottom (both - as a hemorrhoidal treatment for adults: -
1. when practical, clean the affected area with mild soap and warm water and rinse thoroughly
2. gently dry by patting or blotting with toilet tissue or a soft cloth before applying
3. gently apply to the affected area by patting and then discard tissue
4. can be used up to six times daily or after each bowel movement)
2. OR benzocaine (sometimes it's in a spray form, that's how I got it) and it numbs it so it doesn't hurt
3. OR Solarcaine Burn Aloe Extra Relief Spray (at Walgreens)
31) Philips AVENT bottle brush? / The First years Double Scrubber Bottle Brush?


CLOTHES - ALL (i) 0-3 months *3 (ii) 3-6 months *3
19) Body Care banyan
20) Warm socks
21) Warm gloves
22) Monkey Cap
23) Triangular Diapers
24) Mosquito net type ka kuch

MEDICINES
25) Pure Hing – whole (not powder) – for Gas
26) Pure Ghee
27) ColicAid for Gas (adhir’s wife)
28) Neopeptine – Allopathic - for gas
29) Calpol Syrup – for temperature (not added anywhere)
30) Dabur Lal Oil
31) Sona Chandi Oil
32) Dabut Janam Ghutti
33) BalGuti by Green Pharmacy. - Green Pharmacy, 4 Suvarnarekha society, Pune- 52 - e-mail: amodsane@vsnl.com This Balguti pack contains about 20 (jari-butiyan) ayurvedic herbs, which have to be rubbed in circles (ghisna) on chandan base. (to give 2-3 drops each time – 1-2 times each day )
34)

GENERIC BABY
35) Black moti / mankey necklace *2, bracelets *2
36) Silver ware (not very light, little thick so that it does not break - & from a reliable shop, which wont add aluminum to it)
37) Gold sili / tili
38) Small (Chandan types) nutmeg / almonds ghisaney wala
39) Gudhari to cover baby (has cris cross stitches)
40) Langot as a spread sheet (is stitched only on the sides and is rectangular or square)

List of Articles on my blog related to Preg and Child Care

This is a list of Articles on my own blog related to Preg and Child Care

some-websites-for-pregnancy

new-born-infant-care-tips-and-remedies

happiest-baby-on-black-excerps

preventing-baby-hazards

baby-has-cold-home-remedies

seattle-pi-news-article-after-checking

Seattle PI - News Article - After checking your ID, check your children's

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/money/380846_idtheftkids27.html

NEW YORK -- Among the people Linda Foley is currently working to help are a 3-year-old whose Social Security number is being used by someone for work purposes. And there's a 5-year-old whose identity is linked to driver's licenses, arrest warrants for drunken driving, and a warrant for unpaid child support.

These stories may sound unusual, but Foley has heard of many such situations since she started the San Diego-based Identity Theft Resource Center in 1999, and she's convinced that the poaching of children's identities is more common than anyone knows.

Because identity theft is typically associated with financial matters like the misuse of credit cards, most people don't consider the possibility that their child's personal information could be stolen and misused. But more than 34,000 reports of identity theft reported to the Federal Trade Commission from 2005 to 2007 concerned children younger than 18.

"I think we just see the tip of the iceberg. We don't know how deep this problem goes," Foley said.

One reason there is no clear figure for the number of children affected is that the crime often goes unnoticed for many years, said Scott Mitic, chief executive of TrustedID, a Redwood, Calif., company that offers ID protection services.

Usually, there's a narrow time gap between the discovery and the theft, Mitic said of identity theft in general. "But in this age group, you're much more likely to see a lag."

Because children don't have complex financial lives, there is less opportunity to notice that something has gone awry than for adults who try to get loans, mortgages and credit cards -- one major factor that plays into child identity theft going undetected for years.

A second major reason is that frequently, the thief is a parent or other relative of the child.

"In excess of 50 percent of all child ID theft, involves a perpetrator who is one of the parents or someone who is close to the family," estimated Foley, basing her figure on counseling experience and work with law enforcement agencies.

That was the case for Randy Waldron Jr., now 27, who has spent the last decade trying to clean up his reputation.

"My father began using my Social Security number in 1982," Waldron said. But his father was not a part of his life as a child, and it wasn't until 16 years later, when Waldron was applying for college, that it was discovered he had run up a total of $2.5 million in debt in his son's name.

The tally included myriad accounts from unpaid utility bills to defaulted credit cards and back taxes. There was even an unpaid storage facility rental that ballooned to a $10,000 debt.

"It took many years to correct it," Waldron said, estimating that he has spent about $30,000 in attorney fees to clear his name. "I am still hounded by credit card companies, I am still hounded by collection agencies."

Waldron, who lives in Revere, Mass., has worked with Foley in handling his own personal matters, and is now trying to start an organization on the East Coast to help other victims, the Center for Compromised Identities and Child Identity Theft.

Though you may feel secure in your own family, another recurring scenario is that a child's Social Security number becomes associated with a different name -- a technique that's sometimes used by an undocumented immigrant or someone who is trying to avoid child support payments.

"As amazing as it sounds, it is still very difficult for an employer to establish that a Social Security number they've been given corresponds to the person they are employing," said TrustID's Mitic.

"The reason thieves prey on children is for one simple fact. It's because a child in this country is born into a society where you're required to have a Social Security number, and that Social Security number gives you a clean credit record, a clean slate," Waldron said. "If a child identity thief gets a hold of a child's Social Security number at this instant, the parent may not know for 18 years."


TIPS
Some tips for protecting your child's identity:


Teach your child not to give out personal information, particularly online.


Shred all papers to be thrown away that contain account numbers or Social Security numbers.


Store your child's Social Security card in a safe place at home or in a safe deposit box. Neither you nor your child should carry the card in a wallet.


If you receive a preapproved credit application or similarly unusual offer in the mail, investigate. Some banks may add a child's name to a mailing list if an account has been opened in his or her name, but this could be a red flag that your child's identity has been compromised.


If you have reason to believe there may be fraud, write (certified return receipt) to the three credit reporting agencies -- Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion -- and ask for a credit report in your child's name. A child should not have a credit report, because minors are unable to enter into contracts. You can find a sample letter and addresses on the Web site of the Identity Theft Resource Center, idtheftcenter.org.


If you discover a credit report in your child's name, ask to have all accounts, applications and collection notices removed, and have a free security freeze put on the file. This will remain on the file until you request it be removed or temporarily lifted.


Ask if adults who work with your child and might have access to sensitive information -- such as coaches, scout leaders or other activity leaders -- have had a background check. Also be careful when providing documents such as birth certificates to activity leaders, and ask to be notified if they will be shown to other people.


If you think there may be a problem, contact the Social Security Administration for a copy of an earnings statement for your child. If it shows that your child has earned wages, it could indicate theft of the child's Social Security number. Details and forms are available on the agency's Web site at ssa.gov/mystatement.

Preventing Baby Hazards

1. Get down on your hands and knees to your child’s level so you can identify potential hazards.
2. Place child resistant covers on all electrical outlets.
3. Use door knob covers to prevent access to off-limit areas (basement stairs, garage, outdoors, bathrooms).
4. Shorten curtain and blind cords.
5. Use corner bumpers on all sharp furniture corners.
6. Know the name of all houseplants in case a child eats them.
7. Secure any unsteady furniture.
8. Safety-proof your stairs with baby gates, both top and bottom.
9. Secure cords so lamps and appliances cannot be pulled down onto a child.
10. Remove the plastic caps from doorstops or replace them with one piece stops.
11. Consider taking a Basic First Aid and/or CPR class so you can be prepared if an accident occurs.
12. Put Chime Off alarms, when kid opens backyard doors and tries to sneak off; specially if you have a pool in your backyard.


Bottom Line:
Its something to cherish. The 1st weeks and 1st months will
2-3 hours. Rather than trying to make them fall in a routine, enjoy that period.
3 months or 12-13 pounds tab they wake up all night.

Kitchen
12. Keep knives, cleaning supplies and plastic bags out of children’s reach.
13. If stove knobs are accessible to children, use protective knob covers to prevent children from turning them.
14. Unplug all electrical appliances when not in use.
15. Install cabinet door locks if cleaning supplies are stored in the kitchen.
16. Keep handles of pots and pans over the stove towards the inside.
17. Give your baby their own compartment shelf in the kitchen, since they are going to be with you all the time and you will not like to say 'NO' to them all the time.

Bathrooms
16. Lock all vitamins and medicines well out of reach.
17. Use a non-slip mat in the bath or shower to avoid falls.
18. Set your water heater to 120F degrees or lower
Home Office
18. If you use an electric shredder, unplug it when it is not in use. Many new models will work automatically even when in the off position. Never leave it on “Auto.”
19. Beware of dropped paper clips, staples, push pins, and rubber bands that can be choking hazards.
20. Secure cords to computers and monitors well out of reach of little hands.

For Safety products, check this link:
http://www.toysrus.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=2964402
--------
Links to Other Safety Tips
http://www4.toysrus.com/safety/holiShopSafeTips.cfm
http://www.recalls.gov/
http://www3.toysrus.com/safety/prodRecalls.cfm


Main Sources:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_tips-for-safe-bathing_40.bc
http://www.cordblood.net/pdf/200807_Grandparent.pdf

Happiest Baby on the Black - Excerps

=> The 5 S's: Five Steps to Turn On Your Baby's Calm Reflex

1. Swaddling - tight wrapping
2. Side/Stomach - laying a baby on her side or stomach
3. Shushing - loud white noise (just as comes from within)
4. Swinging - rhythmic, jiggly motion
5. Sucking - sucking on anything from nipple or finger or a pacifier


Some Vital Clues to baby's sound
1. Is baby opening mouth and rooting (This could indicate hunger)
2. Is baby yawning rubbing his eyes, moving his head from side to side, or staring out with droopy eyelids (This could indicate fatigues)
3. Does he seem to be intentionally looking away from you aor starting to hiccup? (This could indicate over simulation)
4. Is he making facial grimaces and trying to bear down (This could indicate intestinal discomfort)


Extracted by Deepti from Dr. Karp's Book, The Happiest Baby On The Block -
http://www.thehappiestbaby.com

सनातन धर्म के सोलह संस्कार

सनातन धर्म के सोलह संस्कार - As explained by Mamaji

More more info - visit this link:

Sanatan Dharm Ke Solah Sanskar

A Praj janam sanskar – janam se pahaley - These are performed by parents
1. Garbhadhan
2. Punsayu
3. samantonayan – kesh paan – upar uthana /unnat karna

When chandrama poonya ke nakshatra mein hota hai – tabhi uchit samay hota hai. In this the husband strokes his wife's hair and keeps doing so. Is samay pati devtayone se garb ? ki raksha kari jati hai

B: Shayasham – Bachpan mein honey waley sanaskar
4. jaat karm – jay menas utpan OR after birth

(i) naDhi shed, soney ki sili
(ii) Say this in ear Vedosi iti (=> ved ho) _ managal mein bhagwan ki daya se tum yahan born huey ho, tum gyan roop ho. Issey putr medhavi, shakti sampan, aur shatayu honey ki kamna kee jati hai …. Ant mein pita ussey sambodhit karke apni aatma ka ansh aur hridya ka tukaDha ghoshit karta hai. Sansar ki visham-tayone mein khush rahaney, vijay paney, aur shat aayu, jeeney ke liye vah bachchey se ojasvi bhasha mein kahata hai – ki - Tu Pathhar bann – (to fight with vishamtayone) tu parashu (farsa) ban – tu sona amrit ban


5. naam karan – 10th day – sarthak naam rakhate hain. Nirarthak naam nahin rakhtey hain.
Putr ka sam-akshak naam 2 or 4 akshar ka hona chahiye. A-bhi-na-v

(girl ka) Kahanhiya ka visham akshak – 1 3 5 kavita ak-sh-ara dee-p-ti

Nakshatra vrikhska aur nadi – inke naam nahin honey chahiye
Ant-yaj parvat pakshi saanp ya servants ka arth deney waley naam bhi females ke nahin honey chahiye. ()

naam – swati anuradha

6. nishkraman Nish-kraman –
- papa prays from Bhagwan when sun is outside and for his well being
Pita takes baby in godi and says one mantr – “twam jeev shartaha shatam vadhamano” – this is aashirwav papa gives and then gives in mothers god => menas u go ahead for 100 varsh tak aagey baDhatey raho => shastrone mein iska samay from birth -> 3rd shukla paksh ke 3rd ya 4th tithi …

Shukla = 15 days -> after 1.5 months ke baad 3rd / 4th – day
(approx same time - 1.25 months tak mother does no work)

7. anprashan means khilaney ko -> from the 6th month -> Ghee chawal or dahi- honey-ghee mix; the eldest in home will soney ki salakah or spoon or sikka (ginni or chandi ka sikka) – using that the eldest gives first feed -> else using ordinary spoon itself

Significance: of it is that it is an aashirvad => baby should be able to eat himself and feed ann to others too

8. chura karm _ choota => choti => mundan =>
First make choti – leave some hairs (after janam 1st or 3rd varsh) hair mein dahi dhoodh makhan -> pita devtayone ki stuti karke … balak ke kuch kesh kata hai. Niyam -> pita first uses scissors to cut first few hairs himself and then the nai can cut the rest and then leave a small choti (earlier there used to be very many chotis – for different devtanone ke naam, but now its okay to leave only one choti)

Best part - Pita parsys to churi and prays to ??? and prathna kartey hain … ki hey “he churey tu marna mat. Hey aushadhiyone tum raksha karo”

This is preferred to be done either at nadi (river side) or a teerth place


9. Kran Ched - all sampan people do it these days. Even boys have it some place -> 3rd or 5th year ->
brihastpi recommended 10th 12th or 16th day

helpds to avorodh sharirik rog

By pita – first dahiney then left kaan mein chedan kiya jata hai ->. ved padhaney ki vidha bhi unkey kanone mei pahuchani start ho jati hai


C: shikha Kaleen sanskar – education here responsibility teacher more and less on parents

10. upnayan – => sammep lejana
Means balak ko admission in college – take in college – like in janeyu

yagya paro (janeyu)

10. vedarambh – paDhai shuru ho jati hai
11. sama vartan – niyam 25 varsh 35 or 38 varch -> tak brahcharya ka palan karte huey study. Then can start naukri. (like convocation deekshank)


D: Aashram praveh ke sanskar
12. Vivah
13. Vaanprasth
14. Sanyas

E: Avsan Sanskar
15. An-tesh-thi - After death

There is another tradition in which a rice is filled in a ghara and a mudhra in put it it and then given to some one. Perhaps a pandit ji helps to complete this pooja.

New Born Infant Care - Tips and Remedies

This is a collection of tips that I my mommy and friends have been giving for the past some time. I hope other moms and would-be-moms find it useful too:

=> CHILD SAFETY
http://www.toysrus.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=2964402

=> Top six reasons of why a baby cries These are in order of more probable occurrence.

Understanding and Responding to Baby’s Cries
Crying increases over the first six to eight weeks, then begins to taper off. There may be no identifiable cause of crying (perhaps to release stress). In newborns, assume that crying means hunger and offer feedings. If feeding does not relieve crying, try swaddling and cuddling the baby.

1. Needs Feed - Baby is hungry
2. Diaper change - Baby's Diaper is wet. Normally immediately after a feed.
3. Gas / Colic
4. Sleepy - Needs help to go to sleep
5. Temperature - Baby is feeling too cold or too hot
6. Boredom - Baby has been alone for a while or needs some attention

In all cases, the baby cries in a different way, which people close to the mother such as the mummy or daddy will instinctively understand.

=> TOP FIVE REASONS WHY BABY MAY WAKE UP IN THE NIGHT, for no good reason:

1. Baby is teething
2. Baby has a diaper rash.
3. Needs Feed - Baby is hungry
4. There is too much noise.
5. Baby had a bad dream.

=> SIGNS OF COLIC

Doctors say these are the signs of colic:

1. Baby must cry at least 3 hours a day
2. This must happen at least 3 days a week
3. This must continue at least for 3 weeks

. Colic begins in the first 3 weeks of life and rarely lasts longer than 3 months.
. It occurs in otherwise healthy babies.
. Changing the formula
. Changing to Soy Milk
. Try the car ride
. Generally happens at afternoon and evenings and may last upto 24 hours
. Baby may given a bath, a dim light, a light music, vacuum cleaner (white noise) - helped someone from 3-6 months
. In all cases, the baby cries in a different way, which people close to the mother such as the mummy or daddy will instinctively understand.

=> Remedies for Gas

NOTE: Do not give anything to a baby less than 6 months

Babies LESS than 6 months:
1. Burp - Two positions:
(i)- Hold the baby in upright position giving support of your shoulder. Gently pat on back till baby burps.
(ii) Make the baby sit on your thigh. gently rotate your hand on the back.
2. Make the baby lye down, and gently rotate legs in cyclic movement, so that gas automatically passes from bottom.
3. Make the baby lye down and fold / bend at the knees - this will put pressure and gas will pass from bottom
4. Apply some luke warm oil and hing on the naval. One friend even suggested mixing hing in warm water.
5. Potty / Gas: Massage on the stomach.
(i) 5 times - starting from under rib cage in clockwise direction ->
(ii) Starting from navel - to down below in a vertical line.

Babies MORE than 6 months:
4. Boil chutki bhar ajwain in 2 table spoons water. Give 2-3 drops of the water
5. Grips Water??
6. ColicAid
7. Jayfal + badaam -> 2-4 pieces grind on chandan silbatta sized - > FOR WHAT???

=> Temperature
Calpol syrup

=> PREVENT AND CURE DIAPER RASH
1. Mustard Oil - the best remedy (Manju Bhabhi)
2. Keep at least 1 hour a day for diaper free times. This may be like 15 min, 4 times a day. E.g. immediately after cleaning leave for 15 min. This helps prevent and cure diaper rash. During these 15 min, place the baby on a water resistant mattress cover.

WASHING CLOTHES
1. Use any unscented and most natural form of any detergent.
2. Wash kids clothes separate form parents, for at least an year.

=> COUGH
:Mom can have
1. Milk and Jaifal (nutmeg)
2. Ayurvedic Chai - at least 3 times a day
3. Lots of ginger

:All babies can have:
1. Mustard oil and lahsun (garlic) massage - chest, palms and sole
2. Mustard oil and ajwain massage - chest, palms and sole
3. Jaifal ghisa-hua - - chest, palms and sole
4. Steam with Amritajan in it (but NOT Vics vaborub)

:Baby is less than 6 months
1. jalfal ghisa hua in breastmilk - twice a day
2. janam ghutti - all 22 ghisa hua in breatsmilk - once a day.

:Baby more than 6 months / 1 year
1. One drop of honey
2. Ayurvedic chai
3.

=> Other generic remedies

1. Homeo – never give tablets. Always dissolve in water and then give.
2. Always boil water – before giving to baby
3. How to give water to baby
(i) Ajwain - 1 spoon
(ii) Sauf - 1 spoon
(iii) Sugar - 1 spoon
Put these in one glass of water.

=> MOTHER'S DIET IMMEDIATELY AFTER DELIVERY
1. Do NOT eat food such as Pizza
2. Do NOT eat any spices at all - that includes any type of chili or khatai.
3. Start with khichaDhi for the first few days
4. After 5-10 days start with roti sabzi
5. After 1 week start with gaund ke ladoo - dont start immediately since gaund and ghee is very heavy
For first 40 days (at least for 1st week) eat only KhichaDhi (only moong - green broken), Daliya, Oatmeal.
6. Start with half roti at a time or with a thin ajwain paratha (say after a week).
7. Manju Bhabhi included Matta for her first 5 months.
8. Do NOT have regular water. Boil 1 spoon ajwain in 1 liter water -> sieve and have only that water.
9. Do not have Orange Juice - it is very heavy for baby.
10. Have plenty of liquids
11. Increase milk intake.
12. For snacks - Jeera (cumin) bhoon lo. Crush it. and have it directly at any time of the day. (I think this is also good for better milk production)
13. Have harar + ajwain after every meal.
14. Mother may start chili after around 1.5 month.
15. After the 1st month, start with easily digestible vegetable such as spinach, Methi, Parwal, Ghiya (Gourd), Tori (zucchini)
16. Heavy fruits might not be easily digested (not sure - by Ruchi)

SUGGESTED SNACKS - Diet - Post delivery:
1. Mix Ajwain, ginger (khis ke) and black salt. Put in glass bottle for a day. It will turn black after a day. This preparation lasts for 1 week.
2. Salted and bhuna hua Almonds – mom suggested
3.

FOR BETTER MILK PRODUCTION:
1. Methi sprouts - and mix them in food.
2. Mix methi in aata halwa
3. Methi ladoo
4.

MORE - GENERIC by Harivilas Prabhu ji

FOR HAIR
A:
1. Take 2 tablespoons of aotmeal and 1/4 cup of water. Boil it.
2. Simmer.
3. After an hour it looks like white (something)
4. Put this in blender.
5. Add to it, the 'food for hair' product provided in Ayurvedic Mela
6. Add pure honey
7. Have this once a day.

B: Have 1 table spoon of molasses (kHanDh) with hot milk

C: Have B-pollen directly or mix it in cereal.

SPROUTS
1. Soak sprouts in water for 24 hours.
2. After 24 hrs, drain all water and put in sprouting jar.
3. Sprinkle water on them each day for the next 4-5 days.
4. Sprouts are ready.

: Replace sugar with light agave
: His warehouse is open from 9 am to 7 pm M-F. and 12-6 pm on Saturday.


=> FOR GOOD MILK PRODUCTION
1. Have methi with milk
2. Sprout methi and add sprouts to food
3. Get methi capsules from e.g. General Nutrition Company (GNC) / Any Health Food Store


1. 3 month old has terrible

gas

I wanted to recommend you try Gripe Water for your baby's gas. I used all kinds of gas drops when Nev first came home and none of them helped until I used the Gripe Water. IT IS AMAZING! It not only takes away hiccups the INSTANT you give it to the babies but after using it, I have never had issues with her having any gas pain at all. It's all natural too - just another bonus. Some pharmacy's carry it but most pharmacists don't know what it is if you ask for it. Babies-R-Us carries it, if you find it buy a few bottles because it's nice to have backups and don't forget it MUST BE KEPT REFRIDGERATED! :-)

Ref: http://www.babycenter.com/400_what-can-i-do-about-my-babys-terrible-gas_500562_1000.bc


TIPS FOR MOM
1. Third trimester may come with bleeding gums. If so, dip brush in Listerine and use brush when gums bleed.
2. If feet are tired - soak feet in mild warm salt water – ease tiredness and swelling.
3. To prevent mom from having constipation at delivery and immediately after -
i. Have Prune / Prune Juice / Plums
ii. Isabgol
iii. Nash-pati

CARE WHILE BATHING
1. Before dipping baby, perform the elbow test. Dip your elbow in water to check temperature of water, Our hands a=can tolerate much higher temperatures and are not good to judge whether the water is too hold or too cold.
2. Take care that the water does not reach the ears. For this - bath the baby is three separate steps. (a)Wash hair (b) Wash body separate (c) Wipe face using sponge of towel.

UBPAN
Ubtan - after 1 month
1. rai + baadam + kesar - pees ke ->
2. chiraunji - soack in kacha doodh - then pees lo -> (optioanlly add kesar)
3. chokar + malai + doodh -> make thick paste

New Born ubtan:
aata loi -> upar direction ->

OTHER GENERIC THINGS TO TAKE CARE OF
1. Sterilize your open toys / gifts before giving to the baby.
2. Never give unboiled water to baby
3. Dissolve homeo in water. do not give homeo tablets, to avoid choking.
4. When baby has gas, boil chukti ajwain in little water and give 2-3 drops of water.
5. Don't use ear buds for cleaning the ears. Leave them as such. Only clean the ear lobes (i.e. the visible part of the ears). Once in a while, or if there is too much wax inside, then use cloth and little finger.
6. When using pins, e.g. in diapers - use only double lock pins.


=> Estimated Costs in US in Year 1 of Baby

0700 - Diapers
1500 - Formula
4000 - Day Care for 4 months
1000 - Clothes
---------------------
07200 - Approx costs
---------------------

=>TUMMY TIME (making the baby lye on stomach)
The baby's tummy time should start at 1 month.
Supervised daily tummy time should be a part of the routine.
At 1 month, the baby will be able to lift her head for just a few seconds.
Start at 2-5 min in the beginning.
Tummy time provide shoulders stability, head support, development of strength in the hands.
Should NOT BE done immediately after feeding.
Best place is the floor.
Initially the baby should be provided support with the help of a rolled receiving blanked or a towel under the chest to raise her up. This will make it easier for her lift and turn her head.
Keep the session short at first. Try to start with 2-5 minutes a few times each day.
You may lie on your back and place the baby on her tummy on your knees.
During tummy time, give your baby something to do, such as stimulating toys or mirror.


=>KEEP THESE NUMBERS HANDY ALL THE TIME

1. Your own mobile and home phone numbers
2. Your address
3. Child's Pediatrician
4. Emergency Medical Services (911)
5. Police (911)
6. Your hospital
7. Poison Control Center

=>BOTTOM LINE:
1. There's no point in trying to make a schedule for the baby to sleep the 1st few weeks or the first few months. Rather concentrate on enjoying that time. Babies wont sleep through out the night untill unless they are 3 months of age or are 12-13 lbs.
2. Sleep when you baby sleeps. Do no work when baby sleeps.

=> Bed Time Routine may be started at around 6-8 weeks. E.g.
1. Wash up
2. Put on Pajamas.
3. Read a Book.
4. Sing a song.
5. Say goodnight to toys and pictures in the room.

Activities performed in a ritual each night, make a soothing routine that helps put your baby in the mood for sleep.

If the baby is overactive and having difficult time sleeping, then he might not be getting enough hours of sleep and being hyper-active to counter effect. In that case, every 5 days increase the infant's sleep by 15 minutes. Continue this for at least 5 days, before the infant gets used to it. Then make the infant sleep another 15 minutes earlier for the next 5 days. Continue increasing sleep time, till you find that the infant stops being fussy about going to sleep.

Also try not to make the baby sleep in your arms each time. Try to leave the baby in the crib, kiss him and walk away and make it a habit for him to help him sleep on its own.

=> GENERAL INFORMATIONAL LINKS

natural_birth_vs__medicated_birth

back_labor_and_how_to_prevent_it

pain_relief_techniques_for_labor

What Does stripping Membrane Mean


=> BREAST FEEDING
Help My Latch On Baby


best_breastfeeding_techniques


Signs that baby is getting enough milk


childbirth_class_breastfeeding


Initiating Breastfeeding

1. The best time to introduce the baby to the breast is within the first hour of life.
2. That does not mean that parents should wait an hour to initiate breastfeeding but rather to look for signs that the baby is ready to nurse (known as signs of "readiness") that typically occur within the first few minutes of life.
3. Here are some signs of readiness that shows the baby is ready to breastfeed:

i. Rooting - turning the head to the side and opening the mouth
ii. Sucking - the baby may suck her fingers or tongue or even a finger if placed in the baby's mouth

4. Ensure to clean before and after feeding
5. Npple crack - problem faced when breastfeeding. Solution: Apply coconut oil before bath and wash off with besan....
6. It takes time to learn how to "let down" to a pump. This reflex is the hormonally triggered release of milk from the cells where it is made and can be psychologically triggered or stopped. While breastpumping, I encourage women not to stare at the pump," Harvey says. Instead, watch TV, listen to music, or talk to a friend on the phone, since a pleasant diversion can actually aid milk flow. Moms who are separated from their babies may encourage letdown by calling home and listening to the baby's sounds. They can also listen to a tape of the baby babbling, look at a picture of him or her, or hold something that smells like their baby.


=> Cleaning Diaper Area

1. If using commercial wipes, invert the container between use so that the top wipes are always very moist and therefore less abrasive. If the baby’s bottom becomes irritated, you may want to use wet, soft paper towels or “cotton” balls (actually, it’s often easier to find polyester balls) instead of the commercial wipes. Some parents keep a Thermos jug of warm water and a roll of soft paper towels or “cotton” balls on the diaper table. Pat bottom dry and then allow to air dry for a few minutes.
2. Avoid using baby wipes that contain alcohol, it will irritate the skin of your baby



http://www.thehappiestbaby.com

=> WHEN THE BABY STARTS WALKING
1. Experts say there is no need to worry if the baby starts with pigeon toe(toes bent inside). The baby's feet usually correct themselves, the more the baby walks.
2. But do talk to your doctor, if you notice the following:
(i) Walking on toes for more than 6 months - a sign that the baby may have a tight achiles tendon.
(ii) An uneven leg length - which may also look like a unsteady gait.
(iii) If the baby suddenly stops walking - may be due to an emotional or medical cause.

3. BABY shoes should not be given preference over bare feet. Bare feet are the best.

-----------------------------------------------------

GETTING INFO

1. Register @ the following websites:

Babycenter.com
Babycenter.co.in
Huggies.com – both for info and free samples
Pampers.com – both for info and free samples
Ivillage.parenting.com
Indianparenting.com

http://www.orkut.com/Main#Community.aspx?cmm=18129427

2. Google for pregnancy – there are 100s and 1000s of websites – with plenty of info
3. Get pregnancy related books from stores such Goodwill etc. (you can get them for as cheep at $0.50 - $2.00)

Some (Deepti's Recommended) Must Reads:

What to Expect When Expecting
The Happiest Baby on the Block
Any book on Breastfeeding by La Leche league

--------
Toddlers and Above

1. Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman (Step 1)
2. Thomas Gordon's Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.). (Step 2)
3. How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (Step 3)

4. Assertive Discipline by Lee Canter and Marlene Canter.
5. John Rosemond's "Six Point Plan to Raising Happy Healthy Children".
6. THE POCKET PARENT

7. "Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child" book by Daniel Goleman, John Gottman,
8. "How To Behave So Your Children Will, Too!" video by Sal Severe.


--------

Other Suggested Reading for Parents
i. Infants and Mothers: Differences in Development, T. Berry Brazelton, M.D.
ii. The Baby Book: Everything You Need to Know About Your Baby From Birth to Age Two, William Sears, M.D., and Martha
Sears.
iii. Your Baby and Child: From Birth to Age Five, Penelope Leach.
iv. Caring For Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age Five, American Academy of Pediatrics, Stephen Shelov, M.D.
v. Breastfeeding: Getting Breastfeeding Right for You, Mary Renfrew et al.
vi. Child of Mine: Feeding With Love and Good Sense, Ellyn Satter.


4. Issue CDs and Books from Seattle Library

5. By 4th / 5th month – Register for the Baby Club Membership Classes at Swedish or any other hospital that suits you

6. BabiesRUs keeps on holding free seminars and events at your stores – check out http://www4.toysrus.com/our/bru/prom/store_index.cfm and attend the ones that interest you.


OTHER THINGS TO DO

For Nausea:

Nothing worked for me alone, but cumulatively all 5 together they helped me feel better and be in control:

1. http://www.amazon.com/Sea-Band-Sea-Band-Adult/dp/B00196PI7E/ - I used these bands

2. http://www.amazon.com/Sea-Band-Anti-Nausea-Ginger-Gum/dp/B000K7B5FC/ - these gums have very short lived relief, but now I am again using them in my 9th month

3. http://www.amazon.com/Stash-Premium-Raspberry-Herbal-20-Count/dp/B000CQBZOW/ - sometimes had this tea

4. I also had Vitamin B6 through out my pregnancy, in addition to Pre-natal Vitamins. When my 100 tablet bottle got over by 4th – 5th month, I stopped having B6. With stopping it my nausea returned back. So I started taking it again,

5. I had ordered this homeopathy medicine and http://www.hmedicine.com/homeopathic/medicine/1066/q_morning%20sickne - and avoided brushing my teeth or having any strong spices / flavors at least ½ hour before and after the medicine.

---------------

Must do – rest – take lots and lots of rest – if you feel like sleeping 16 hours a day – do it.
Before 16 weeks call AETNA (if that’s your health insurance provider) – they give you freebies (mainly reading material) if you call them in time.


WHAT TO EAT (just as we discussed)

Plenty of water – number #1 guaranteed remedy for menstrual like cramps during pregnancy
Plenty of fruits – not coz they are good for but coz they are the only thing that help you keep going, keep your throat from drying and fill your stomach

BOTTOM LINE:

Eat what you like to - listen to what you love to hear – do what interests you – live your life as your body tells you to – there absolutely no need to pay attention to what the world tells you to do (that includes everyone on this earth)…

Resources:
http://www.pamf.org/children/common/development/Newborn.pdf

----------------
---------------

=> DIET

1. Make a banana, almond soothie, add ¼ cup water and ice – and this is a whole meal snack. – Suggested by Aetna nurse.

2. For swollen legs
HorseGram (or katti kaita) Boil 1 teaspoon in one glass of water. Water becomes deep red. Now add 6-10 glasses of water to this boiled water. Water becomes pink. Drink this water the whole day. In US given to horses. Available at Indian Stores

3. To increase protein amount in diet
By Dr. Friele –=> (1) Ensure (protein drink) (2) Carnation Instant Breakfast (protein powder mixed wit milk)
----------------

Tracy Hogg recommends Baby use Haberman Nipples (guess now called Special Needs Feeder) as they are closest to the mother's and help in eliminating the nipple confusion problem.

When I searched for haberman on net.. I came arcoss this link: http://www.cleftadvocate.org/feeders.html

=>
For Cough (by Pushpa aunty)

1. Make a thick solution of jaggery. All Turmeric and make into a thick paste.
2. Pous 1-2 drops of mustard oil in the ears
3. Pour 1-2 drops of til Oil in ears
4. Dipear buds in oil and apply and rotate just once in the nostrils.
5. For Pure Indian Spices - go to http://bazaarofindia.com/ or call at 1877.897.0026
6. Make the folowing mixture: Tusli powder - 2parts, Ginger powder - 1part, Haldi powder 1 part, Licorice (Deepti thinks this is mulaithi)- 2 parts --> Now take 1/4 spoon of this mixture, add jaggery in hot water and give to baby.
7. Also after 1 year of age, give 1/2 tea spoon with honey and luke warm water.
.....
For cough
by David - give the medicine Robatusab. Most docs recommend this medicine and remember to give him water after that.
.....
By Dan Zizza
Other Natural clinics in Seattle
1. Bastyr Natural Health Clinic
2. Seattle Institute of Oriental Medicine.

लव कुश द्वारा प्रस्तुत रामायण

हम कथा सुनाते राम सकल गुणधाम की,
हम कथा सुनाते राम सकल गुणधाम की,
ये रामायण है पुण्य कथा श्री राम की,

जम्बुद्वीपे, भरत खंडे. आर्यावर्ते, भारतवर्षे,
इक नगरी है विख्यात अयोध्या नाम की,
यही जन्म भूमि है परम पूज्य श्री राम की,
हम कथा सुनाते राम सकल गुणधाम की,
ये रामायण है पुण्य कथा श्री राम की,
ये रामायण है पुण्य कथा श्री राम की,

रघुकुल के राजा धर्मात्मा, चक्रवर्ती दशरथ पुण्यात्मा,
संतति हेतु यज्ञ करवाया, धर्म यज्ञ का शुभ फल पाया,
नृप घर जन्मे चार कुमारा, रघुकुल दीप जगत आधारा,
चारों भ्रातों के शुभ नामा, भरत, शत्रुघ्न, लक्ष्मण रामा,

गुरु वशिष्ठ के गुरुकुल जाके, अल्प काल विद्या सब पाके,
पूरण हुयी शिक्षा, रघुवर पूरण काम की,
हम कथा सुनाते राम सकल गुणधाम की,
ये रामायण है पुण्य कथा श्री राम की,

मृदु स्वर, कोमल भावना, रोचक प्रस्तुति ढंग,
इक इक कर वर्णन करें, लव कुश राम प्रसंग,
विश्वामित्र महामुनि राई, तिनके संग चले दोउ भाई,
कैसे राम ताड़का मारी, कैसे नाथ अहिल्या तारी,

मुनिवर विश्वामित्र तब, संग ले लक्ष्मण राम,
सिया स्वयंवर देखने, पहुंचे मिथिला धाम,

जनकपुर उत्सव है भारी,
जनकपुर उत्सव है भारी,
अपने वर का चयन करेगी सीता सुकुमारी,
जनकपुर उत्सव है भारी,

जनक राज का कठिन प्रण, सुनो सुनो सब कोई,
जो तोडे शिव धनुष को, सो सीता पति होई,

को तोरी शिव धनुष कठोर, सबकी दृष्टि राम की ओर,
राम विनय गुण के अवतार, गुरुवार की आज्ञा शिरधार,
सहज भाव से शिव धनु तोड़ा, जनकसुता संग नाता जोड़ा,
रघुवर जैसा और न कोई, सीता की समता नही होई,
दोउ करें पराजित कांति कोटि रति काम की,
हम कथा सुनाते राम सकल गुणधाम की,
ये रामायण है पुण्य कथा सिया राम की,

सब पर शब्द मोहिनी डारी, मन्त्र मुग्ध भये सब नर नारी,
यूँ दिन रैन जात हैं बीते, लव कुश नें सबके मन जीते,

वन गमन, सीता हरण, हनुमत मिलन, लंका दहन, रावण मरण, अयोध्या पुनरागमन.

सविस्तार सब कथा सुनाई, राजा राम भये रघुराई,
राम राज आयो सुख दाई, सुख समृद्धि श्री घर घर आई,





काल चक्र नें घटना क्रम में ऐसा चक्र चलाया,
राम सिया के जीवन में फिर घोर अँधेरा छाया,

अवध में ऐसा, ऐसा इक दिन आया,
निष्कलंक सीता पे प्रजा नें मिथ्या दोष लगाया,
अवध में ऐसा, ऐसा इक दिन आया,

चल दी सिया जब तोड़ कर सब नेह नाते मोह के,
पाषण हृदयों में न अंगारे जगे विद्रोह के,

ममतामयी माँओं के आँचल भी सिमट कर रह गए,
गुरुदेव ज्ञान और नीति के सागर भी घट कर रह गए,

न रघुकुल न रघुकुलनायक, कोई न सिय का हुआ सहायक,

मानवता को खो बैठे जब, सभ्य नगर के वासी,
तब सीता को हुआ सहायक, वन का इक सन्यासी,

उन ऋषि परम उदार का वाल्मीकि शुभ नाम,
सीता को आश्रय दिया ले आए निज धाम,

रघुकुल में कुलदीप जलाए, राम के दो सुत सिय नें जाए,

श्रोतागण, जो एक राजा की पुत्री है, एक राजा की पुत्रवधू है, और एक चक्रवर्ती राजा की पत्नी है, वही महारानी सीता वनवास के दुखों में अपने दिन कैसे काटती है. अपने कुल के गौरव और स्वाभिमान के रक्षा करते हुए, किसी से सहायता मांगे बिना कैसे अपना काम वो स्वयं करती है, स्वयं वन से लकड़ी काटती है, स्वयं अपना धान कूटती है, स्वयं अपनी चक्की पीसती है, और अपनी संतान को स्वावलंबी बनने की शिक्षा कैसे देती है अब उसकी एक करुण झांकी देखिये;

जनक दुलारी कुलवधू दशरथजी की,
राजरानी होके दिन वन में बिताती है,
रहते थे घेरे जिसे दास दासी आठों याम,
दासी बनी अपनी उदासी को छिपती है,
धरम प्रवीना सती, परम कुलीना,
सब विधि दोष हीना जीना दुःख में सिखाती है,
जगमाता हरिप्रिया लक्ष्मी स्वरूपा सिया,
कूटती है धान, भोज स्वयं बनती है,
कठिन कुल्हाडी लेके लकडियाँ काटती है,
करम लिखे को पर काट नही पाती है,
फूल भी उठाना भारी जिस सुकुमारी को था,
दुःख भरे जीवन का बोझ वो उठाती है,
अर्धांगिनी रघुवीर की वो धर धीर,
भरती है नीर, नीर नैन में न लाती है,
जिसकी प्रजा के अपवादों के कुचक्र में वो,
पीसती है चाकी स्वाभिमान को बचाती है,
पालती है बच्चों को वो कर्म योगिनी की भाँती,
स्वाभिमानी, स्वावलंबी, सबल बनाती है,
ऐसी सीता माता की परीक्षा लेते दुःख देते,
निठुर नियति को दया भी नही आती है,

उस दुखिया के राज दुलारे, हम ही सुत श्री राम तिहारे,
सीता मां की आँख के तारे, लव कुश हैं पितु नाम हमारे,
हे पितु, भाग्य हमारे जागे, राम कथा कही राम के आगे.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

पुनि पुनि कितनी हो कही सुनाई, हिय की प्यास बुझत न बुझाई,
सीता राम चरित अतिपावन, मधुर सरस अरु अति मनभावन.

Power of Positive Talk

A Wonderful Forwarded Email
----------------------------

I remember my dad teaching me the power of language at a very young age. Not only did my dad understand that specific words affect our mental pictures, but he understood words are a powerful programming factor in lifelong success.
One particularly interesting event occurred when I was eight. As a kid, I was always climbing trees, poles, and literally hanging around upside down from the rafters of our lake house. So, it came to no surprise for my dad to find me at the top of a 30-foot tree swinging back and forth. My little eight-year-old brain didn't realize the tree could break or I could get hurt. I just thought it was fun to be up so high.
My older cousin, Tammy, was also in the same tree. She was hanging on the first big limb, about ten feet below me. Tammy's mother also noticed us at the exact time my dad did. About that time a huge gust of wind came over the tree. I could hear the leaves start to rattle and the tree begin to sway. I remember my dad's voice over the wind yell, "Bart, Hold on tightly." So I did. The next thing I know, I heard Tammy screaming at the top of her lungs, laying flat on the ground. She had fallen out of the tree.
I scampered down the tree to safety. My dad later told me why she fell and I did not. Apparently, when Tammy's mother felt the gust of wind, she yelled out, "Tammy, don't fall!" And Tammy did. fall.
My dad then explained to me that the mind has a very difficult time processing a negative image. In fact, people who rely on internal pictures cannot see a negative at all. In order for Tammy to process the command of not falling, her nine-year-old brain had to first imagine falling, then try to tell the brain not to do what it just imagined. Whereas, my eight-year-old brain instantly had an internal image of me hanging on tightly.
This concept is especially useful when you are attempting to break a habit or set a goal. You can't visualize not doing something. The only way to properly visualize not doing something is to actually find a word for what you want to do and visualize that. For example, when I was thirteen years old, I played for my junior high school football team. I tried so hard to be good, but I just couldn't get it together at that age. I remember hearing the words run through my head as I was running out for a pass, "Don't drop it!" Naturally, I dropped the ball.
My coaches were not skilled enough to teach us proper "self-talk." They just thought some kids could catch and others couldn't. I'll never make it pro, but I'm now a pretty good Sunday afternoon football player, because all my internal dialogue is positive and encourages me to win. I wish my dad had coached me playing football instead of just climbing trees. I might have had a longer football career.

Here is a very easy demonstration to teach your kids and your friends the power of a toxic vocabulary. Ask them to hold a pen or pencil. Hand it to them. Now, follow my instructions carefully. Say to them, "Okay, try to drop the pencil." Observe what they do.
Most people release their hands and watch the pencil hit the floor. You respond, "You weren't paying attention. I said TRY to drop the pencil. Now please do it again." Most people then pick up the pencil and pretend to be in excruciating pain while their hand tries but fails to drop the pencil.
The point is made.
If you tell your brain you will "give it a try," you are actually telling your brain to fail. I have a "no try" rule in my house and with everyone I interact with. Either people will do it or they won't. Either they will be at the party or they won't. I'm brutal when people attempt to lie to me by using the word try. Do they think I don't know they are really telegraphing to the world they have no intention of doing it but they want me to give them brownie points for pretended effort? You will never hear the words "I'll try" come out of my mouth unless I'm teaching this concept in a seminar.
If you "try" and do something, your unconscious mind has permission not to succeed. If I truly can't make a decision I will tell the truth. "Sorry John. I'm not sure if I will be at your party or not. I've got an outstanding commitment. If that falls through, I will be here. Otherwise, I will not. Thanks for the invite."
People respect honesty. So remove the word "try" from your vocabulary.
My dad also told me that psychologists claim it takes seventeen positive statements to offset one negative statement. I have no idea if it is true, but the logic holds true. It might take up to seventeen compliments to offset the emotional damage of one harsh criticism.
These are concepts that are especially useful when raising children.


Ask yourself how many compliments you give yourself daily versus how many criticisms. Heck, I know you are talking to yourself all day long. We all have internal voices that give us direction.
So, are you giving yourself the 17:1 ratio or are you shortchanging yourself with toxic self-talk like, " I'm fat. Nobody will like me. I'll try this diet. I'm not good enough. I'm so stupid. I'm broke, etc. etc."


If our parents can set a lifetime of programming with one wrong statement, imagine the kind of programming you are doing on a daily basis with your own internal dialogue. Here is a list of Toxic Vocabulary words.
Notice when you or other people use them.
Ø But: Negates any words that are stated before it.
Ø Try: Presupposes failure.
Ø If: Presupposes that you may not.
Ø Might: It does nothing definite. It leaves options for your listener.
Ø Would Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen.
Ø Should Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen (and implies guilt.)
Ø Could Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen but the person tries to take credit as if it did happen.
Ø Can't/Don't: These words force the listener to focus on exactly the opposite of what you want. This is a classic mistake that parents and coaches make without knowing the damage of this linguistic error.
Examples:
Toxic phrase: "Don't drop the ball!"
Likely result: Drops the ball
Better language: "Catch the ball!"
Toxic phrase: "You shouldn't watch so much television."
Likely result: Watches more television.
Better language: "I read too much television makes people stupid. You might find yourself turning that TV off and picking up one of those books more often!"
Exercise: Take a moment to write down all the phrases you use on a daily basis or any Toxic self-talk that you have noticed yourself using. Write these phrases down so you will begin to catch yourself as they occur and change them.

Go Green - Nice Short Article By Rahul

trashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrashtrash

You can take Rashtra out of trash. Or you can take trash out of a Rashtra. Either way ...
Well here's tips for micros steps on how to Go Green.

Tip #2 "Of course, pens are not just dime a dozen but free at your favorite stationery room at work. Be considerate and do not use another pen until you are done with the current one. Guard it with same love you would give to your iPod."

For the rest of it the article ... read here

http://in10cities.blogspot.com/2007/08/go-green.html

June 16th - Another Link I came across today:

http://earth911.org/blog/2008/06/16/8-ways-to-green-your-shopping/
Go to the home page http://earth911.org/ for more info.

MSG - A slow poison under the disguide of a Natural Flavoring

Source of Information:
Websites posted at the bottom of the article.

(Note: The following information about natural food additives is provided on this website as a public service.)

---

Title 21, Section 101, part 22 of the Code of Federal Regulations defines natural flavorings & flavors as follows:

The term natural flavor or natural flavoring means the essential oil, oleoresin, essence or extractive, protein hydrolysate, distillate, or any product of roasting, heating or enzymolysis, which contains the flavoring constituents derived from a spice, fruit or fruit juice, vegetable or vegetable juice, edible yeast, herb, bark, bud, root, leaf or similar plant material, meat, seafood, poultry, eggs, dairy products, or fermentation products thereof, whose significant function in food is flavoring rather than nutritional.

Under current regulations, food manufacturers can obscure a variety of products – including derivatives of meat, poultry, seafood, dairy products, and nuts – under the guise of "natural flavoring."

"Natural" does not mean it is not a harmful food additive. "Natural" only means that the natural flavor ingredient originated from a natural source. For example, "natural" can mean a type of food additive such as MSG which has been found to be a dangerous food additive ingredient for many of the people who consume this so-called natural additive.

The not so new game is to label hydrolyzed proteins as pea protein, whey protein, corn protein, etc. If a pea, for example, were whole, it would be identified as a pea. Calling an ingredient pea protein indicates that the pea has been hydrolyzed, at least in part, and that processed free glutamic acid (MSG) is present. Relatively new to the list are wheat protein and soy protein.


Now that we know what Natural Flavoring means, lets go ahead with the main article on MSG:


~ Author Unknown

The food additive MSG (Mono-Sodium Glutamate) is a slow poison. MSG hides behind 25 or more names, such as Natural Flavoring.' MSG is even in your favorite coffee from Tim Horton's and Starbucks coffee shops!

I wondered if there could be an actual chemical causing the massive obesity epidemic, and so did a friend of mine, John Erb. He was a research assistant at the University of Waterloo in Ontario , Canada , and spent years working for the government. He made an amazing discovery while
going through scientific journals for a book he was writing called The Slow Poisoning of America.

In hundreds of studies around the world, scientists were creating obese mice and rats to use in diet or diabetes test studies. No strain of rat or mice is naturally obese, so scientists have to create them. They make these creatures morbidly obese by injecting them with MSG when they are first born.

The MSG triples the amount of insulin the pancreas creates, causing rats (and perhaps humans) to become obese. They even have a name for the fat rodents they create: 'MSG-Treated Rats.'

When I heard this, I was shocked. I went into my kitchen and checked the cupboards and the refrigerator. MSG was in everything -- the Campbell 's soups, the Hostess Doritos, the Lays flavored potato chips, Top Ramen, Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper, Heinz canned gravy, Swanson frozen prepared meals, and Kraft salad dressings, especially the 'healthy
low-fat' ones.

The items that didn't have MSG marked on the product label had something called 'Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein,' which is just another name for Monosodium Glutamate.

It was shocking to see just how many of the foods we feed our children everyday are filled with this stuff. MSG is hidden under many different names in order to fool those who read the ingredient list, so that they don't catch on. (Other names for MSG are 'Accent, 'Aginomoto,'
'Natural Meat Tenderizer,' etc.)

But it didn't stop there.

When our family went out to eat, we started asking at the restaurants what menu items contained MSG. Many employees, even the managers, swore they didn't use MSG.

But when we ask for the ingredient list, which they grudgingly provided, sure enough, MSG and Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein were everywhere.

Burger King, McDonald's, Wendy's, Taco Bell, every restaurant -- even the sit-down eateries like TGIF, Chili's, Applebee's, and Denny's -- use MSG in abundance. Kentucky Fried Chicken seemed to be the WORST offender:
MSG was in every chicken dish, salad dressing. and gravy. No wonder I loved to eat that coating on the skin -- their secret spice was MSG!

So why is MSG in so many of the foods we eat? Is it a preservative, or a vitamin?

Not according to my friend John Erb. In his book The Slow Poisoning of America , he said that MSG is added to food for the addictive effect it has on the human body.

Even the propaganda website sponsored by the food manufacturers lobby group supporting MSG explains that the reason they add it to food is to make people eat more.

A study of the elderly showed that older people eat more of the foods that it is added to. The Glutamate Association lobbying group says eating more is a benefit to the elderly, but what does it do to the rest of us?

'Betcha can't eat [just] one,' takes on a whole new meaning where MSG is concerned! And we wonder why the nation is overweight!

MSG manufacturers themselves admit that it addicts people to their products. It makes people choose their product over others, and makes people eat more of it than they would if MSG wasn't added.

Not only is MSG scientifically proven to cause obesity, it is an addictive substance. Since its introduction into the American food supply fifty years ago, MSG has been added in larger and larger doses to the pre-packaged meals, soups, snacks, and fast foods we are tempted to eat everyday.

The FDA has set no limits on how much of it can be added to food. They claim it's safe to eat in any amount. But how can they claim it's safe when there are hundreds of scientific studies with titles like these:

'The monosodium glutamate (MSG) obese rat as a model for the study of exercise in obesity.' Gobatto CA, Mello MA, Souza CT , Ribeiro IA. Res Commun Mol Pathol Pharmacol. 2002.

'Adrenalectomy abolishes the food-induced hypothalamic serotonin release in both normal and monosodium glutamate-obese rats.' Guimaraes RB, Telles MM, Coelho VB, Mori C, Nascimento CM, Ribeiro. Brain Res Bull. 2002 Aug.

'Obesity induced by neonatal monosodium glutamate treatment in spontaneously hypertensive rats: An animal model of multiple risk factors.' Iwase M, Yamamoto M, Iino K, Ichikawa K, Shinohara N, Yoshinari Fujishima. Hypertens Res. 1998 Mar.

'Hypothalamic lesion induced by injection of monosodium glutamate in suckling period and subsequent development of obesity.' Tanaka K, Shimada M, Nakao K Kusunoki. Exp Neurol. 1978 Oct.

No, the date of that last study was not a typo; it was published in 1978. Both the 'medical research community' and 'food manufacturers' have known about the side effects of MSG for decades.

Many more of the studies mentioned in John Erb's book link MSG to diabetes, migraines and headaches, autism, ADHD, and even Alzheimer's.

So what can we do to stop the food manufactures from dumping this fattening and addictive MSG into our food supply and causing the obesity epidemic we now see?

Several months ago, John Erb took his book and his concerns to one of the highest government health officials in Canada. While he was sitting in the government office, the official told him,
'Sure, I know how bad MSG is. I wouldn't touch the stuff.' But this top-level government official refuses to tell the public what he knows.

The big media doesn't want to tell the public either, fearing issues with their advertisers. It seems that the fallout on the fast food industry may hurt their profit margin. The food producers and restaurants have been addicting us to their products for years, and now we are paying
the price for it. Our children should not be cursed with obesity caused by an addictive food additive.

But what can I do about it? I'm just one voice! What can I do to stop the poisoning of our children, while our governments are insuring financial protection for the industry that is poisoning us?

This message is going out to everyone I know in an attempt to tell you the truth that the corporate-owned politicians and media won't tell you.

The best way you can help to save yourself and your children from this drug-induced epidemic is to forward this article to everyone. With any luck, it will circle the globe before politicians can pass the legislation protecting those who are poisoning us.

The food industry learned a lot from the tobacco industry. Imagine if big tobacco had a bill like this in place before someone blew the whistle on nicotine?

If you are one of the few who can still believe that MSG is good for us and you don't believe what John Erb has to say, see for yourself. Go to the National Library of Medicine at www.pubmed.com Type in the words 'MSG Obese' and read a few of the 115 medical studies that appear.

We the public do not want to be rats in one giant experiment, and we do not approve of food that makes us into a nation of obese, lethargic, addicted sheep, feeding the food industry's bottom line while waiting for the heart transplant, the diabetic-induced amputation, blindness, or other
obesity-induced, life-threatening disorders.

With your help we can put an end to this poison. Do your part in sending this message out by word of mouth, e-mail, or by distribution of this printout to your friends all over the world and stop this 'Slow Poisoning of Mankind' by the packaged food industry.

Blowing the whistle on MSG is our responsibility, so get the word out.

[End of Article]
----------
Read More Here:
1. http://www.sptimes.com/2005/09/25/Perspective/Want_full_disclosure_.shtml


The information above was picked up from the following websites:
1. http://www.rense.com/general52/msg.htm
2. http://www.shaysways.com/msg.html
3. http://www.sellingsalesmanship.com/natural.html
4. http://www.foodproductdesign.com/archive/1992/0992CS.html.

How Big a Bed Do you Need

Though most of us need a bed just good enough to lie down, others may need much much more than that. For instance if you are Abhinav Shukla, you may like to take the entire space of a Queen size Bed (Refer: Standard Bed Sizes )












































Looking at the bed you may feel that the bed looks just enough for one person. But if you got a chance to click at the link above, this Queen Size Bed is 60'' wide, which makes it f. i.v.e f.e.e.t wide. Frankly it is good enought for three normal sized girls side-by-side !!!

No jokes. The snap proves it all, how hard it was for the camera to capture his complete length, breath and width just this morning. Poor me, no wonder I sometimes end up on the floor and at other times, even outside the bedroom (from where I was trying to capture his unique sleeping posture). ...And wasn't it last night when he comes in at 2 am, only to wake me up in the middle of the night, to tell me that I was needed to get off from 'his' half of the bed and push myself to 'my own' half. Oh perhaps your focus stopped at the words 'comes in' and are wondering what was he doing away from home at that odd hour. Well to be honest with you, Abhinav rarely ever goes out of home. Normally any time between 12 am and 4 am, Abhinav leaves the company of... <>... in the hall and enters our bedroom, with the only caveat that while I am asleep, he enjoys all his time with his dear and beloved ... sob sob ... <>, which is also his second wife... the laptop!!! Abhinav not only gobbles and eats with her, but even cleans his nostrils with his index finger in front of her! His nostrils have now widened apart so much, that I sometimes get this idea of using them as for storage if we ever fall short of bins and boxes to keep our things. If nothing else, at least our first kids' clothes can at least be stored with in them.

Oh well, I was telling you my woes as being a wife. So while it's such a major effort on his part to spend more than 5 minutes sitting with me, this laptop has the potential to keep my husband's eyes glued to her electronically lighted stupid face for tens of hours at a stretch. Before marriage, my life's biggest irony was, that I presumed I knew Abhinav well before I agreed to marry him. Alas the biggest shock of my life came to me when I moved to his apartment after marriage, and the fact that Abhinav was already married was disclosed. That time his wife was the 'The Television'. As this revelation was not enough to end our honey moon period, there were more surprises for me in store ahead. An year later, when our company sent us to Seattle, and Abhinav announced he was in no mood to purchase a TV for our Seattle apartment; I finally felt relieved on the though of getting a lost husband back into my life for the first time. But who knew my dreams were short lived. Who knew, that Abhinav would soon forget his first love and fall in love with the laptop. Alas, sometimes I wish I was born in the dark ages !!!!

Coming back to storage problems, we don't have any kids yet, but eventually will have some day. Abhinav dreams of naming his kids, something irrelevant of their gender, so that he does not have to think again if the boy turns out instead of a girl, or vice-versa. He's already decided he will name his kids in this order:
1. Karmanye Vaadhika-raste,
2. Maa Phaleshu Kadachana,
3. Maa karma-phala-hetur-bhoorma,
4. MaTe sangostwakarmini.

Which means, some day when we will finally have two kids, and he will name all four of them; or rather bestow on them; long Sanskrit names. The whole idea behind this philosophy is that by the time their poor mummy would have ended calling out the complete names, they would have run 5 Kilometers away from their home, and would this way avoid eating their vegetables or cleaning the mess behind them. This way their papa can get all the credit for having protected his kids from mummy's tortures throughout their childhood. Oh my God! I wonder what does future hold for me.

Perhaps Abhinav is not bad after all. With my cyst troubling me since a couple of weeks and Abhinav being on vacation between his job switch; we had more time at home together. So I shared my idea of playing chess with this with the intention of trying to keep both of us together in the same room for more than 5 minutes at a stretch. Little did I know that this game will be so morally discouraging for me. In the 6 matches we have played in the past 3 days, Abhinav has been defecting me each and every time - the worst ever defeat I have ever faced in my entire lifetime.

I could have shared more about my mistakes in my moves, but I am now forced to get up, as the big buy just has just woke up from his sleep and expresses his desire to be with his <> for sometime. See you later friends.

Earth Hour - March 29th 2008

http://www2.earthhourus.org/



Hoping that Seattle along with many many more cities participates in this next year.

There is nothing more satisfying to the heart at this hour, than the fact the America is slowly realizing that energy comes at a cost; and that Americans and folks from other countries too, have started - not taking energy - for granted. !!!

All the best to this mission.

Vigyan Kumar Sharan is no longer with us

Vigyan Kumar Sharan (August 11th 1951 to January 21st 2008)

Today he is not with us and we are sad.

Vigyan Sharan, the 4th brother from the eldest among 5 brothers and 1 sister was born in Old Delhi to Atul Krishna Sharan and Sushila Sharan. As his brothers grew up and left abroad for higher studies and better job opportunities, Chachaji choose to stay close to his parents, to take care of them for the rest of his life. Chachaji in his twenties got married to Sandhya Goel who in the coming years gave birth to Ankur Sharan and Ankit Sharan.

Memoirs and Memories:

To say that Chacha ji was the most beloved member of entire family will not be an over statement. There was no one, I know of, who did not love or praise Chachaji. To add to that, his sense of humor was one of best in our entire family. The first fond memories of Chachaji date back to 18th April 1987. He and my cousins Ankur & Ankit had come to pick dad, mom and me at the airport. At this point of time, I fail to recollect any part of the entire discussion as he drive us back home in his white Ambassador. All I recollect is having met one of the most jovial people; and that how happy he made all of us feel that day.

In the next few months, we settled with Chachaji and grandparents in Kavi Nagar at Ghaziabad, and started staying together. One morning, I was in Chachiji's room cribbing about how badly the mosquitoes bit me all night. Pat came Chachaji's reply - "arey vo tumhara khoon peetey hain, tum unka khoon peelo." Phir apni hatheli pe ek mara hua machar dikhate huey kahate hain, "ye dekho, is macchar ne do din pahale mera khoon piya tha, to mainey issey ussi samay maar diya". Ye sunte hi, Chachiji maza lete huey kahati hain "chi, kitne gande hain aap. Do din se haath bhi nahin dhoye". Phat se Chachu bolte hain, "Areyy is macchar ko preserve karna tha na... abhi to main do din aur apna haath aaisey hi bina dhoye rahunga"... hum log unki baat sunte hi hasney lage. Us hasi mein mera machhar kate ka dard bhi khud se gayab ho jata hai. Abhi apney puraney din yaad karti hoon to yaad aata hai, Chachiji ne mujhe theek se us macchar ko dekhney nahin diya tha. Shayad unhoney jalsi se apni kale pen se ek gola banaya ho, dard se mera dhyan bhat-ka-ney ke liye.
Translated in English
Chachiji: "oho .. they drink [suck] your blood, you drink theirs.". Then as he showed a dead black mosquito on the corner of his palm hand, he we went on to say... "See this one? This one was sucking my blood two days back, so I crushed it between my hands then and there. On listening to our conversation Chachiji who was standing near teasingly asked - "Dirty you! you haven't even washed your hands since two days"; to which Chachu promptly replies - "...oh I had to preserve this mosquito ... and I don't plan to wash my hands for the next two days either ...". We all start laughing. In that laughter, my mosquito bite pain disappears automatically on its own. As I try to recollect, I remember that Chachu didn't allow to see the mosquito clearly enough. Perhaps he had quickly made a black dot with his pen, to divert me from that pain.
One evening we were all sitting in the drawing room and Ankit; who must have been 4 years then; was being naughty. Chachu was running after him and Ankit went hiding under the dining table. The next moment I hear, three big and loud bangs - and I most obviously conclude - these must be three loud smacks on poor Ankit's tiny little butt. At an stupid little age of eight it was pretty normal for me to be smacked or slapped each time I repeated one of my old mischiefs. And I thought, so how on earth could my cousin Ankit, who was even younger to me spare beating? Oh and I might add, I had never seen Chachu even scold anyone, so I was a little scared trying to imagine my cousin's embarrassment. With these thoughts in mind, I slowly opened my eyes only to find him giggling and cuddling in Chachaji's arm!!! Chachu had only pretended to hit, and had made all that loud notice by clapping his hands against each other to scare him from being naughty. That's when I learn this neat trick to scare kids myself from tearing books or playing with dangerous equipments at our home ... and believe me it has never failed till date.

In summers, sometimes we all would go for an evening walk after dinner. In those days, it was rather below my standard to approach people to make them listen to my magnificent self-made poetic compositions. So absolved was I in self admiration, that I used to compose them and later recite them to my own self. But who after all doesn't like to be appreciated, and so while I was desperately in search of someone to pay attention, during one of these walks Chachu catches me singing. The very first words of appreciation that I ever received for my childhood poems, or rather to say; the first person in my life to notice that 'hidden childhood talent' within me was none other than Chachaji himself.

After a couple of years, Chachaji moved to Allahabad. My grandparents moved with him. Daddy went on to construct a new house in Nehru Nagar in the same city. Now and then Chachaji would come and visit us, especially while going to and fro Delhi. On those trips, he always carried with him, a small magical briefcase. I called it magical since believe me, it used to contain everything that as a kid, I could have possibly dreamed to possess. As for my mumma she was so very proud of their respectful devar (brother-in-law). After Chachu left, I would hear her say in admiration, "just look at how systematic your Chachaji is, or see how well well managed is everything that Chachaji undertakes".

It was during one of these trips in 1997. I had been preparing for the Engineering entrance exams for an year at home. One day Chachu comes, and shares with my parents a small newspaper clipping. It was an advertisement for admission to the Institute of Engineering & Technology at Rohilkhand University. Over several years of shattering mumma's dreams of becoming an IPS, IFS officer, to getting selected in IIT; she had gradually stared coming to terms with my true form. Imagining her only child joining a merely two year college did not seem an attractive option; but upon re-evaluation of her child's dismal past performances, she agreed on allowing me to appear for the University's entrance exams. Later on it turned out that the only college Chachu had expressed his desire that I appear for, turned to be the one where I graduated from. Post admission, for my Chachu - I had taken the biggest step towards creating history - by becoming the first 'Lady' Engineer of our Sharan family. I initially counted how many times he said that he was proud of me, but then I have finally lost count now...

So as I mentioned IET was not an old college and obviously did not have an established girls hostel either at that time. My parents were pretty anxious about my accommodation at Bareilly. On the day of admission Chachaji was instructed to make sure that he doesn't submit the admission fees until he made sure that I had a safe and secure place to stay. Back in 1997, IET RU had a temporary girls hostel 2.5 kms away from the college, which was actually not easy to locate. In a country like India, where maps.google.com don't help, and directions on boards are installed only to mislead you, it was quite a pain to search for my hostel. So it was local help which came to our rescue, and that local help was a labor's boy playing in the that neighborhood. Born to a doctor, I learnt about diseases and precautions much before I learnt my ka, kha, ga (or my a, b, c's). My daddy would tell, what his medical books had taught him - how to keep yourself away from sources of infection. Staying away from untidy labor kids was one of those ways. As a practicing doctor, if ever my daddy would have to shake hands with someone of that demeanor, he would first sanitize his hands with an disinfectant before touching any thing else in his surgery. Oh well! coming back to my hostel's search; so after ensuring that the hostel and safe and secure; before leaving; Chachu did something I could least imagine him to do. To my utter surprise and horror, Chachu actually bent down to where that dirty kid wrapped in torn clothes was still playing in dirt and soil, shook hands with him, patted him on his back and even went on to thank him for providing directions . That day Chachu taught me the basic fundamentals of human existence - all of us are equal - something perhaps what all those medical books combined together have over the years failed to teach millions of medical doctors.

For the next four years of my graduation - from counseling, to admission, to paying regular visits to me at Bareilly, to help me pack up and send me back to my parents at the end of those four years; I just can't forget of what Chachu meant to me all those days. He was my source of my inspiration, strength and worldly knowledge - all bundled up in the form of my dear Chachu. His endless stories from his world of experience while escorting me in my trips were all too mesmerizing for me. Numerous times have I tried to question myself - what and where would I have been, had Chachu not taught me, what he had.

Four years of college end at Bareily. It was time for an admission to post-grad. I went to stay at Chachu's place seeking an admission to the Management College in Allahabad. On one those nights Chachu took me, Chachiji and my two cousins for a tasty masala dosa treat at a famous, under-the-sky eatery in Allahabad. Chachu had refrained himself from eating that day, however he helped himself with an ice cream. After dinner Chachiji left to pull her car closer to where all of us were seated and Ankur-Ankit followed her. Left at the table were me and Chachu. I too got up and started looking around. A couple of minutes later, the waiter comes carrying the bill in his hand. Here goes one of Chachu's usual pranks.

Chachu: "Ye bill to mera nahin hai"
Waiter: "Arey sa'b kya baat kar rahe hain, aap sab ne abhi issi table pe to baith ke khaya hai!"
C: "Arey bhai, main to keval yunhi baitha tha. Main to un charone mein se kisi ko janta bhi nahin hoon. Lagata hai vo log tumko paisey diye bina hi chale gaye. Mainey to bhai ek icecream zaroor khayi thee. Mujhe to tum keval uske hi paisey batao?"
W: (thora dukhi hokar): "Sa'b..."
C: (Poorey pasiey aage baDhate huey) Ye lo bhai, ginlo.
Waiter ginta hai. Khoob hasta hai, aur chala jata hai. Later when Chachu narrates this to Chachiji and Ankur-Ankit and we again burst into riots of laughter.

English Translation:
C: "This doesn't look like my bill"
W: "Sir that doesn't sound right. Just a short while ago, weren't all of you were sitting and eating at this same table?"
C: "I was sitting here just like that. I don't even know those four folks. Looks like they all left without paying your dues. Oh and yes, I just ate an ice cream; so could you please tell me how much much should I pay for that?"
W: (His voice going deeper)"Sirrr..."
C: (Handing over the entire money) Hey my brother, count this.
W: (Counts the money, laughs heartily and leaves)

A couple of years pass by. I did not take admission at Allahabad. I join Infosys and am now around 23-24 years old. At this age, my own dear Chachu starts conspiring against me with my parents to plan my wedding and ultimately my exit out of my own home. He is searching a good match for me. Chachu sometimes reaches out to his personal network, sometimes may have even scanned newspapers, consults Buaji and after all his research; prepares his own short listed version of prospective bridegrooms for me. Yeah all this work work was in addition to being a great son, husband and a fabulous papa to his own to two kids!

As a side note: During that same time, Abhinav and I meet at Infosys Bangalore. Abhinav's family accept me as their first Non-Brahamin daughter-in-law member. Sharan family stands by and accepts Abhinav too. The two families together blessed our marriage on Nov 28th 2004.

I was a grown up now. These days, I had started thinking that perhaps that magical briefcase no longer was a magical one after all. With a couple of months left for my and Abhinav's marriage, Chachu and Chachiji were at my parents place almost all the time now. From driving mumma daddy to different banquet halls, to deciding menu, publishing cards, to deciding my jewelery, to searching for the best fabric in town for their beloved brodegroom's suit .... and a never ending list of to do items in preparation of our wedding. Chachu and Chachiji just went on and on and on. So engrossed were they in the entire preparations, that at one point of time, not only my sari shop uncle, but even a recent new neighbor of ours has started confusing my Chachi with my mumma!!! While our families were busy with the preparations and arrangements, Abhinav and me were busy meeting project deadlines back at Bangalore. It's only now that I have realized, everyone in this industry is replaceable - and that includes you and me - who have been coined as the most critical resources by our managers. Anyways, back to marriage preparations; when we arrives home, I could feel that excitement everywhere. Our engagement day arrives and suddenly mummy runs out of her room; and addressing my daddy says - "Arey sunte ho, I was suppose to go to the bank today to get crisp new [Rupee] notes for the ceremony. All I have at home are old and used ones. How can we give them to her sasural waley [my would-be-family]??"... Before daddy even got a chance to console mummy with one of his standard, one-answer-fits-all-questions - 'theek hai, ab jo ho gaya so hoga', out of that same briefcase today came out; a bundle of crisp, out of the mint hundred rupee notes. Chachu went on to say "Arey Bhabhiji, main jab ghar [Bareilly] se nikal raha tha, to mainey socha ki shayad in noto-ne ki zarorat paDhey, to isliye main apney saath le aaya... ye leejiye."

I might have grown, but the magic was that briefcase had not faded!

Translated: Chachaji addresses mummy: "Bhabhiji, when I leaving home, I thought these bills may be required at some point of time, so I brought them along with me."

In this world full of people hungry for praise, it was just so very weird; not to hear Chachu say a word in self admiration; on this or any many more occasions before and after; when his foresightedness and maturity helped everyone whose lives he touched.

During those numerous ceremonies before and during the marriage, it was not a surprise to hear whispers from friends and on-lookers - 'Vigyan apney bhaisa'b ko kitna kyar karte hain. Lagta hai bilkul apney baDhey bhai ki akhein hain.' or 'Vigyan ne bas Deepti ko janam nahin diya hai, Shadi mein lekin pita ki zimmedariyan baDhi hi dakshata se nibhayi hai'

Translated: 'Vigyan loves his elder brother so much. It feels that he is surely Vinay's eyes and support.' or 'Vigyan wasn't Deepti's real father, but otherwise he had executed all responsibilities as that of a father with such dexterity.

When mouth cancer first struck Chacha ji, and he did not disclose it to anyone, these words were said about him "...so busy was he solving the problems of others, that when he needed help, he had no clue how to approach anyone himself. He kept his own griefs hiding then tight within himself; completely failing to realize that this time 'he' was the one was needed some support ... "

I was one of the unfortunate members of the family who wasn't with him, during his last days. When I begged to grant me and Abhinav leaves, to go and see him, Abhinav'as manager made excuses about Dovetail 3.4 releases (the then project's name); and postponed our trip, by a month. Chachu perhaps had already waited too long enough, to wait for me to come to India and allow me to see him. He now no longer had the strength to be able to take it any more.

In his last days, this is as it has been described to me. Chachaji could not eat with his mouth. He used to consume food through tubes. He could not speak. He used to communicate using pen and paper.

My colleague Tracy; fortunately a cancer survivor; suggested that the best I could do to make him feel better and tell him that I cared, was to write him a hand-written letter.

For a person who was in pain and distress; who might have been tired of taking care of anything and everything himself; who needed a break from his ever increasing responsibilities over his wearing shoulders. My Chachaji who was much more than just Chachaji has left us for ever today. Today he is not with us. I am wondering should we really be sad.

Bhagwan unki aatma to shanti dein. May his soul rest in peace. Please pray to God so that my family gains strength to bear this loss.

His is survived by his wife Sandhya Chachi and his sons Ankur Ankit and their wifes.


Left to Right - Sandhya Sharan (Chachiji), Savita Sharan (mummy), Deepti Sharan Shukla, Abhinav Shukla, Vinay Kumar Sharan (daddy), Vigyan Sharan (Chachu), Sushila Sharan (Dadiji)







Left to Right - Adarsh Kumar (Phuphaji), Vinay Kumar Sharan (Daddy) and Vigyan Kumar Sharan (Chachaji)







Left to Right - Vigyan's two sons Ankur & Ankit








Left to Right - Abhinav Shukla & his yonger brother Anand Shukla serving dinner to Vinay Sharan and his younger brother Vigyan Sharan; both at the same time










Glossary:
'Chachi ji' or ‘Chachu’ - dad’s younger brother
'Bua ji' - dad's elder or younger sister
'Devar' - husband's younger brother (brother-in-law younger to husband)