My Pregnancy Woes

Dear Friend,

I, either by misfortune or by God’s plans (which a small human mind like mine can not yet comprehend); ended up with a messed up case of ectopic pregnancy. I was unaware of how the US health care system works and learnt several lessons in the due course of this uneventful duration a very hard way. The purpose of my jotting down this article is not to blame an individual or a group of people, but is to merely share my own experiences.

Why would I like you to read it :

In case you find the article boring or too long, I would still suggest you go through the brief lessons (numbered and in bold). The discussion before and after them are the incidents and experciences which led to those lessons. To be honest, it was heartening for me to recollect every fact that happened in the past two months and write them down today. However I would be more than glad if even a single expecting mother would continue reading below and eventually could save herself from even the slightest of a trauma.

It stared with the very first sign of pregnancy, when I missed it on the due date in Feb. Abhinav my husband, brought me a home testing equipment which gave positive results. But on reading carefully the pregnancy tests carton itself mentioned there weren’t 100% reliable and they merely confirmed the presence of the HcG (pregnancy hormone) in the body. I had then misinterpreted that once pregnancy hormones have stared developing in ones’ body; one would eventually become a mother. Now this was also my lesson number one.

ONE:
Alas the truth was most women conceive more number of times in their life than they ever come to know perhaps for just a couple of days or weeks in their lives. But with the slightest mismatch or defect during matching of the chromosomal patterns; the women's monthly cycle continue in process and the fertilized egg leaves the body without her knowledge. Also if however the expecting-mother did a home test in the mean while, she may falsely conclude of being preg (pregnant).

Back in mother India, doctors are easily reachable and there aren’t umpteen protocols to follow before getting a chance to meet them. Here I learned the lesson Number two.

TWO.
In US doctors are extremely busy (or perhaps just pretend to be busy). Thus in cases such as scheduling your first pregnancy appointment, you are not given a chance to see the doctor for approximately the first 5-6 weeks after having first contacted them. Also in your best interest it’s always get associated to a medical physician the moment you land in US. There after taking your physicians’ help to get you through to a specialist for any specific medical conditions you may encounter during your stay in US, is the easiest way to get timely treatment.

Taking your first pregnancy appointment with the gynae:
Being completely unaware myself, I was looking forward to discuss the weird ways in which my body had now started reacting. I was indeed a little tense as this was my first one and I did not have any sort of information to refer. So I planned to schedule an appointment with is stated to be the best hospital in Seattle – The Swedish Hospital and was given to choose one from the list of three doctors from the other side of the phone. I choose Dr. Judy Kimelman not due to any medical reasons (cause I thought all the MDs who have been practicing since years in this medical unit must be equally qualified and any one would treat me well. The decision to choose Dr. Judy and not the other two docs, was an unwise one. My then manager Judy was a kind hearted lady which led me to falsely conclude that given a chance I should thus pick up the doctor with the same name.


Misleading or confusing details on the doctor's profile:

As the very first line on Dr. Judy webpage says “Accepting New Patients”, My knowledge of this foreign language called English told me, that it means this doctor is free to attend to new patients. For if it were not so, then the webpage maintainer of the doc would have replaced it with some thing more meaningful… such as sorry can you please check with the next door doctor, cause I cant see you for at least a month or two from now on.

Anyways I was hopeful to meet Dr. Judy the coming weekend. Why on a weekend, well back in my land, for all non urgent visits to the doctor we would prefer going on weekends rather than weekdays to save us from disrupting our normal schedule on weekdays. It took me a while to understand how dangerous it was to fall ill on a weekend in the US. This was also my lesson number three Also all non US-citizens, do take this as a word of caution from me.

THREE: Never fall ill on weekends in US. Even if you do, and chances are there that you can wait, then do it!!! At least till the first approaching weekday. There is no guarantee to be seen by the specialist you are planning to meet. Also don’t be surprised if you go plan for a brief 15 minutes visit and come out after 8 hours, hungry tired and exhausted. Well that’s what happened to me at-least and unfortunately to every one I have talked to about going-to-the-emergercy-nightmares there after.

Not knowing lesson three myself, I had a hard time at the emergency and vowed never to go there again myself. I learnt that the doctors can be sued for having missed any test. To be over-cautious, and focusing on how they can save themselves from the probable loss of their carriers, a doctor in the emergency would do every possible test he / she ever read of in his medical studies. (no kidding there!)

At the Hostipals' Emergency:
I had then thought rather that waiting at home for the next couple of weeks for the due appoitment, with my weird symptoms getting worst with each passing day, it would be better to go the emergency today instead. Thus I landed in the emergency room on a Saturday in the hope to meet a gynecologist just some 15 off minutes and get answers to three main questions that were bothering us the most. It was early morning and both and me hubby thought it wise to complete this more important and supposedly brief task before coming back to having our breakfast. To our dismay it was 30 min even before I was even first registered; followed by another 60-90 min before finally someone attended me. No body bothered to even inform how longer would I be waiting, less bothered to know why I there at the हostipal in the first case . Finally when some one turned up to check the blood preasure, I felt like speaking to thin air before me. On this nurse’s face there was not an iota of concern, on hearing my symptoms. I was indeed real inexperienced to not be able to distingue her from a doctor, but having listened to my concerns I would have appreciated a brief sentence as to what why she was behaving she way she was. I would have apprecaited being told that I would be meeting the doctor. I soon realized she was the only one with this no-communication problem. Within minutes the famous Swedish Hospital started appearing to me like a place full of robots completely devoid of any sort of human emotions otherwise found in traces in homo sapiens outside the premises of this place. What followed inside the room for the next for the next 5 hours, was simply insane. Even long before the doctor spoke to me first, the nurse had already sucked 6 test tubes full of blood out of me. (what grieved me most was the one, out of those six, which kept lying on the table in front on me and was never used till the end). There were blood tests and pelvic tests and ultrasounds. Before each painful test I was told, that without conducting it, would be the only way to confirm or otherwise disprove my pregnancy. Each post-test, the doc would still be unsure of the results and would say “ Well you know it could be either ways.” Subsequently I would be subjected to a more painful test. This continued for five hours. Believe it or not, all these while Abhinav and I repeatedly requested to confirm my pregnancy, but they were firmly determined to do was not to flinch in those recorded set of pre and post test statements they made. To top that all, the uncertainty in the mind of the doc was like to icing to cake of the feeling of being cheating at the hands of a doc. Finally I was being told that their ultrasound machine could detect no sac within the designated area inside me, so off I was sent to the radiologist & ultrasound department whom I was told had more technologically advanced and highly specialized ultrasound machines Could some one please ask him, why on earth did the doctor than use less advanced machine in the first case. (Backstret Boys: Stop plai'n games with me...)

At the mercy of the ultrasonogragher:

Little did I know that this was going to be the most painful test of my entire life. Little did that inhuman lady care about my pain, suffering or tears. My hearing my screems out of pain made other nurses run to come and try to help me. But my ultrasonogragher; she let non one enter inside. Instead she kept on mercilessly moving that huge transducer probe (the probe that sends and receives the sound waves) within me, at full speed, as if I were a dead log or a machine myself. My pain not baffling her an inch; she was indeed more deeply involved in scoffing over the less-advanced machines being used by the doctors in the emergency. To be honest, to a patient the Swedish is like one single entity. It hardly matters as to who uses the most advanced gizmos, unless the patient gets the required correct and timely treatment. That alone is what matters to the patient. Well it was only much later after subsequent internal ultrasound tests at the Nordstrom building in the same complex, (specially the one done by Sue) did I realize that on thinking about the patient as being a human being, these tests are absolutely painless and are for most of the time oblivious to the patient under diagnosis.

Incorrect results after 8 hours in the emergency:
Well hours of tests at the emergency department and not a single hope of getting a result either ways. We finally called up our expecting guests and apologized that they would have to cancel the program of meeting us today. (You know, when we told them we were at the emergency since morning, they heard not an inch of surprise in their voice. ) Tired, hungry and exhausted and with no pointers on what to do next, before we were finally released after 8 hours then, the attending nurse assuming her duty to share her own or the doctors point-of-view decided to tell me that the of HcG level in my blood was extremely low. This she said concluded that I was not carrying. Without any concrete answers either ways, this first confident answer was like a bitter pill but at the same time welcomed by us. After learnt the Lesson Number THREE the hard way, a more important lesson was the lesson number four.


FOUR: Never ever completely rely on the advice of your doctor / nurse / nurse practitioners etc. Their advices are bookish, unpractical and some times to the extent of being misleading. There isn't a need to show disrespect towards them, but never believe in all the crap they tell you. Also internet is not a dependable source of information for medical problems; none the less it tells you far more than any doctor does. Believe me you would never repent to consult the net for your medical problem. More over there are chances to hear what others did when they faced the same problem as you do today, which means a lot when you so far form your near and dear ones back in your country.

There are some very useful websites on the net which tell you the optimal range count of HcG hormone in your blood after ‘x’ number of days of having conceived. After the long uneventful day, this information I found of net, had as if, brought in me a new hope and a new life again. Knowing that it had not been long since I had conceived, the numbers found in my blood, even thought low, were exactly what they should have been. And after all how could a mother’s heart ever get convinced by some doctors and nurses that the baby growing within her was all but an illusion !!!

Having confronted disappointment at the Swedish emergency, I now eagerly waited for the next two weeks to be able to see the doctor as being promised by her receptionist.


Trying to talk to your doctor in US - forget it!:

In the mean time, another interesting line that caught my eye’s attention on Dr. Judy’s webpage, at the link below was:

Want to make an appointment?

Call Judy Kimelman, M.D.'s office directly at (206) 682-5800

What I understand from my little knowledge of English language was that I could talk to her if I called on this number. What follows is lesson number five I learnt:

FIVE: This particular line “Call doctor ABC directly”, too like the earlier line is there on every doctor’s profile, to make you foolishly believe into the fact when you would call, the doctor would be pick up call. That they would be sitting at the other side of the phone to welcome you with open arms and warm hearts. The truth is different. One or two receptionists are appointed for about approximately 8-12 doctors in a group. It is they who atttend those 'direct' calls for all the doctors within that group on the given numbers. The website maintainers will never ever write the truth, because who knows this too might end up affecting the doctor’s business. What I guess is that on knowing the truth, people would be lesser disheartened to know how unreachable is their doctor whom they are longing to meet. Here’s what an ideal line would look like “call the doc’s receptionist directly”. (The following small description if added, too would be highly useful and applicable likewise: ….. And when you call, do not flinch if you need to wait for 10 or even 20 or even more minutes to get through us. Also though we have an emergency number where we pick up your call instantly, yet we do not share it with you, our patient, for reasons which we do not know ourselves or perhaps for a reason we can’t come up with right now…) You think I am joking… in that case do let me know when the next time you see a women in pain struggling to get across to the doctor through all these mediocre people. Next was lesson six.

SIX: When scheduling an appointment, the patient is told to wait for another 2-3 weeks before she gets the chance to meet the doc. Its only on arriving at the doctor’s clinic, that the patient is informed that she is about to meet the doctor’s nurse practitioner and not the doctor herself. I personally believe that the receptionists sitting at the clinic should be advised to communicate this little fact to the calling patient when being approached by the latter the first time. This would definitely help overcome any confrontations due to miscommunications and also have the patient develop more faith in the system.

Can a 20 year old experinced nurse be confused? Perhaps she is confusing you:
On a Friday, I meet the nurse practitioner Lucia who is kind to me. After listening to me and performing her own set of tests, she confidently proclaims I am not preg. To answer my bleeding issue which was happening since past 2 weeks and the positive results of my home tests, she explains it to be a miscarriage which has either already taken place, or would surely happen in the very near future. I am back home; my dreams of becoming a mom all shattered once more. I am going through a wave of sadness when Lucia calls me. She is alarmed about the increased levels of HCG in my blood, since I last got them tested at the emergency. She fears it might be an ectopic pregnancy and tells me to schedule an appointment with a different specialized ultrasound lab. To emphasize on what she explained me earlier that day, she repeats that within days I would feel a sharp unbearable pain on just one side of me. This pain would confirm that there is an ectopic pregnancy within me. HcG is higher. Inside I am a little too over joyed... What if perhaps the baby is actually growing; may be in small tiny little corner there, all safe and sound, and perhaps its too tiny for them to see even with all their fancy gizmos and equipments. May there is much hue and cry about nothing out here. My emotions are going topsy turvy all over from the beginning; right from when we did the first home tests.

Well after making several phone calls to and fro to the lab and clinic, for some missing info the lab requires I finally get the appointment for the coming Friday.
(I bet had Lucia been serious about my tests, she would have got one scheduled then and there herself, but going by her attitude there wasn’t much to be worried about.) Friday comes and something bad happens. Its early morning and I am too pale to go out. As for the condition of my clothes and the bed sheet I conclude that last night was when I finally passed away all developments going in within me. My heart sinks again and surely not for the first time. I call the nurse to confirm what she had speculated earlier, but by the time she gets the voice mail the scheduled ultrasound appointment’s time has passed away. Lucia’s predictions of an ectopic are fading. The sharp pain which I was told can't go away with any amount of pain killers, never ever comes to me. But yes the miscarriage as she thought earlier has taken place. The baby has passed away today. All what is my own is my frail feeling which increases with each passing day.

Lesson number SEVEN: When a miscarriage take place, the expecting mother should possibly see a white fluffy ball like substance instead of the usually stuff she otherwise sees on a regular basis. This is what Dr. Judy later described it should have been and not based on my personal experience. If this is actually true, and it is something which I knew of then, I would not have ended up missing, (which I think of today) a very critical appointment

Nurse Practioner: Lucia's contradictory statements:
When Lucia got my message, she argued about the possibility of still being an ectopic development. Well this has not been the first time in the past few days when someone doctor or nurse has given contradictory statements. Far from being sympathetic of what going within me, or even being even the slightest apologetic that the symptoms she shared could have varried effects, that what she said earlier was not the absolute truth; rather to protect herself, she humiliated me and told me to get another appointment; which I anyway took immediately thereafter. She also wrote a note in my history of records (which I procedured later) "pateint not co-operating". Wow what I great thing to say to some one in my my condition!

My first symtoms of ectopic pregnancy:
Following Tuesday, I finally did have that ‘unbearable pain’, but it was in my abdomen as different from being on one of the sides, as Lucia had explained earlier. What could it be? Now which of the two predictions by Lucia’s were right... the miscarriage or the ectopic? Well she had very clearly specified that the pain would be on just one side and that too somewhere much below from where it was happening. This was surely not an ectopic pain. must be something else, I thought. My pain surely left me incapable to even contact the receptionist on my own. More over I wasn’t even sure of as to whom to contact. What if this was not related to my pregnancy woes at all. I had skipped my lunch… may be it was just a gas.

There I was, lying at the office surrounded by my all my team mates to comfort me. My manager at office, Judy tried to call up Lucia and after the first 10’s of minutes in trying to get through, was put on hold for around another 30 minutes. Even with all my team mates attending to me, all I felt was that the 'US-doctor' is perhaps too busy to talk to the poor patient and the patient is all by herself left at God’s mercy. 45 minutes on Judy's personal phone, an ailing patient finally gets an appointment to come over after 24 hours !!! Indeed so very generous of them. Perhaps the medical system wasn’t that bad after all.

Wanting to answers at the emegency, forget it!
Wednesday, after much await, I meet Dr. Judy for the first time. She manually examines me and is unable to diagnose the condition as an ectopic pregnancy. She identifies equal soarness on either side of me. I am sent in for another internal ultrasound. (Oh wow, I get this appointment for this painful test immediately this time, for which I was now suppose to wait another for 4 days.) So from the ultrasound room, I am sent to another room with as usual no one to tell me why and what is happening to me since past 4 hours. Abhinav just doesn’t get tired or loose hope. He keeps on enquiring about my wellbeing from people sucking more blood out me or the ones moving me around; with as usual no answers in return. I am finally back in that dreadful emergency, clueless and speculative !!! An IV (intravenous) is inserted in the same poor vein which has been wounded again and again for blood samples over the past couple of weeks. An IV is a needle through which a drug, nutrient solution, or other substance administered into a vein. After hours of wait and confusion of whether Dr. Judy was suppose to see me again or not, she finally does choose to see me again, only to break the dreadful news. My ectopic pregnancy needs to be treated immediately!

Lesson number EIGHT. Always check out the possibilities on the net if you end up having a medical case. Over awareness is never harmful. All this while I read about ectopic pregnancies and never paid attention, I kept on fooling around with myself believing that such problems can never happen to me. Later my physiotherapist Andi too shared the same feeling with me about believing that nothing less than the best would ever happen to you when she had ended up with an early baby due to an early dialtion of her cervix, followed with a one month bed rest.

Wish to get some mental peace - go and rest, even if the doc doesn't say so
I was being lured by my doc to have metotraxate injection shots in lieu of a surgery for my own benefit. Hubby and me with all our faith on stake on this doctor, agreed in unison. There came two horse sized needles and in they went. Another 15 minutes and I was finally released after being told about the next set of days when I would have to come to give in my blood samples required for monitoring my progress. Was also told about some dietary precautions but other than that no rest or the like was advised.

Back at office and Judy, Laurel, Karen, Nisha, Shikha my other team mates were more than surprised to see me smiling back at them as usual on Thursday morning. They took turns to play being mummy and advise me to slow डाउन advise me to slow down on my work lest I tire out myself. I heeded to their advices thinking it was out of sheer affection for me, yet within I felt no difference those injections could have caused.

Patient pays for doc's mistakes - but how many more times?
Thursday noon I get a call at my office to come in for a blood sample. On the other side is Angie, who is Lucia’s and Dr. Judy’s assistant and is unwilling to hear from me the conversation held between Dr. Judy and me the previous night. I fail to tell her that I am suppose to come for a blood sample the nest week and not today. I plead her to clarify this herself with Dr. Judy. An incorrect note left by Dr. Judy herself last night for Angie has created all this confusion. After getting convinced that Angie would finally call up the doctor to clear the confusion, we disconnect after 15 minutes of discussion; only to get two harsh calls on my extension and cell from Lucia; threatening to discontinue my treatment in case I did not comply exactly as I was being told to.

Lesson number NINE is that doctors are not only unreachable but their word is also like the final verdict of the Supreme Court’s judge. As for the patients, well the patients are dumb and moron creatures who deserve the kind of treatment which now Angie and Lucia together were giving me.

Fair enough I leave for the clinic. Repeat my last night’s discussion with the doc and my vain attempts to explain this to Angie. I also learn that all this while, the doc had not been consulted. I guess explaining this face to face to Lucia helped her change her mind. She consulted another available doctor in that group to confirm what I was saying was right; came back and for the first time in all applogized.

In due course of time, I also learn that each doctor in that group looks at at-least one ectopic patient per day on an average. With 20+ years of experience, this would mean 20* 52*5 (remember in US the docs see patients only on weekdays, thus multiplying the total number of weeks with five day) = 5200. This means that approximately both Lucia and Dr. Judy alone should have treated more than five thousand patients till date. Well perhaps I was a unique case and required to be treated differently from those five thousand patients in the past. Never mind.

Beware of their advise: "Take painkillers"
There comes another problem. More than my right side, my armpits had started paining. They were sore with all the injections and IV attached to them. I was suggested a pain killer. Ah perhaps in that thick file of papers listing my details, Lucia forgot to read that yesterday the doc had advised me not to take pain killers for a while. I was no longer surprised at her now. When a doctor can advise my 26 week pregnant friend 4 tablets of advil for a toothache (This friend was consulting a different doctor at Swedish at the same time), why should my 20+ year old experienced nurse practitioner not be allowed to experiment on me with painkillers in this delicate condition of mine. Woudn't it too cruel of me not to let her experiment with me.
I explain to Lucia I can’t take pain killers. Cold packs are told as an alternate solution.

Lucia continues with her hit and trials on me:
With all that exertion from office to clinic and back to office and all the ado about nothing, I am tired and exhausted. Within 24 hours after the injection shots, I can finally make out the growth to have taken on the right side. Today the pain is unbearable. By noon I rush to the clinic only to be have more blood drawn. Something which follows at the clinic it is even today extremely hard to imagine it happening to me. It was to have Lucia in one her experimental moods actually tring her hands on me in sucking out the blood. Did she forget that less than 24 hours ago expressed that were soar and sensitive. Lucia picked up a wrong point for the blood out of me. Out of severe pain in those ailing arm pits I cried out out loud enough. She took out the empty syringe saying, “I am sorry, I can’t take out the blood. I would call some one else who is professional.” This arm pit was so blue and sore now that no one who drew blood for the next 5-6 times in the next the next 45 days, ever dared to even touch this arm. Finally a professional blood sucker comes with a finer and less painful needle known as the butterfly, and draws blood from the other relatively less sore arm pit. First time in all these times, have I felt blood being taken out of me with minimal pain.

Lesson number TEN: When in pain, shout out loud enough and force the pathologist to use a butterfly instead of one of the normal syringes. If your arms hurt too bad, refuse to give blood unless she uses the butterfly syringe. Another sore incident happened with me earlier when at the Dyna Pathology lab where I used to give my blood samples at designated intervals, when I requested this particular blood sucker to use a butterfly. The pathologist not only refused for reasons she gave me none to use a butterfly, she even nearly corroded my skin while cleaning it with the antiseptic. I made a face in pain and requested her to be soft to which her rude reply was. “I have not even inserted the injection and you behave like this. It’s all there in your head. !!!”

After the injections, days started getting worst for me. I stopped feeling like going to office altogether. Wanted to sleep / rest whole day long. I was not doing anything to the least which would make me exert me even the slightest, however I felt physically incompetent for any task. I had no explanation for my helpless condition I was in. It was a waste to tell my nurse or the doctor cause they had no straight forward answers as to why I felt this way, or even why my pain had become intense since those injection shots.


Technology in India may be less advanced, but common-sense is far more ahead:

Now comes to my rescue a stranger whom I have never met. As a backup plan, my mummy ji had been consulting a gynae in India all this while. A call to this doctor and a brief 2 minutes chat, marvelous Dr. Suman Singhal tells me, how would continue feeling the way I am for at least two weeks after the injections due to their reaction on my body. I needed complete rest for 14 days. Wish I knew that earlier and could like wise communicate at the office. It would have saved me all the embarrassment of getting leaves extended for every two more day the entire last week.

Are all US Doctor's the same?
As I later learnt, my cousin Piyush Bhaiya's doctor too did not advise him bed-rest after a surgery for his Pilonidal Cyst. Multiple surgeries continued at the same location for his deteriorating condition for over an year. Those with the same problem back in India, and a little luckier with the doctors knew the importance of a 2 week bed-rest after that kind of surgery. It may seem highly unfair of me to say this, but it seems to me doctors like Dr. Judy and my cousins doc thrive and end by earning their bread by bringing in their patients again and again using such tactics. (Another cousin) Santosh bhaiya feels otherwise. He says if the doctor informs the patient about some the rest to be taken post-treatment, the patient might not go in for such a treatment in the first case. He added that the requirement for three different surgeries being advised for three different ailments to him and his family, by different surgeons were all nullified with time. The symptoms disappeared on their own or with non-allopathic oral treatments at the most.

Hey there, discard those apprehensions within you!
I guess Indians are too afraid of several things when it comes to changing a doctor or taking a second opinion. My cousin's and mine fears for taking a second opinion had been exactly the same before having complications in our medical procedures. We both felt its better to stick to one doctor since (s)he knows your entire case history and can always make better decisions based on your past. Also that on taking a second opinion your current doctor might feel offended.

Lesson number ELEVEN: Today I feel thoughts mentioned above are completely baseless in a country like US. Always, without fail take a second opinion in any slightly complex medical condition. It’s quite possible that your doctor for unknown reasons has not advised you any rest, in condition which might actually force you to have bed-rest or is missing some thing important you ought to know. Again if you are not satisfied with your second opinion, there is no harm is taking even a third one. Your health is solely your own responsibility. Issues such as bed-rest etc may not be addressed on the internet. Hence this lesson is an addition to the the solution provided in lesson number four.

Is the climax or the anticlimax of my ectopic pregnancy:

Today its been 37 days so far, and I am still bleeding continuously, day after day ever since I was preg, without any gaps in between. I am re-assured by Dr. Judy and Lucia that my body is treating this as a miscarriage and there is nothing to worry about. After the metrotraxate injection shots, the HcG levels in my three new blood samples thus taken adhere to the percentages they should have been as per what Dr. Judy’s medical books advise. 10 days after, again on a Friday, I am here before her being explained by the doc that that my condition is improving as it should and that no further ultrasounds are required. With high confidence, she is assuring me that I am out of danger and since the injections have worked well, I would definably require no surgery for the removal of that growth. Like a stubborn student I continue questioning her for the proportionate relationalship of the decrease in HcG and the sac size within me. I am told theoretically the proportion in the decrease in the two is directly proportionate. I also get a green signal to take a flight to visit a friend Sachin Garg; a journey me and Abhinav had planned long before I even knew I had conceived. However since I am traveling, thus to avoid any risks of any possible complications, I should better have an ultrasound on this coming Monday.

On reaching home, I inform my worried team mates about the cancellation of my surgery. I am gradually coming up with the loss of some one within me but am still happy that as Dr. Suman Singhal said, one day I would forget or at least overcome this whole episode as a big bad dream.

Friday evening I am doing just fine. Monday morning I am not:
Next Monday, the first day of our Navratra (an auspicious Hindu festival lasting 9 days each twice an year), I say my prayers to God and leave for the last ultrasound of this episode. Today on March 19th, 2007 I realize that I owe a life to Sachin Bhaisa'b (Abhinav’s friend) who had long back invited us to come over the coming weekend.

What I learn today completely shakes me. In all these years, for the first time I wake up my parents back in India, in the middle of the night. Their brave daughter who always told them her illnesses only once she had over come them; today cries out to tell them that she is going to be operated in 2 hours from now.

I was informed that I had started internal bleeding and that the sac size within me had doubled from the size it was before the injections. I was surprised at how I was unflinching bearing this increased pain over the weekend, unaware of these adverse changes within me. That said, I was not allowed to go back home (and certainly not to attend any unfinished chores) I was immediately admitted, given full anesthesia and both the fallopian tube and the growth were removed by Dr. Harvey the then on-call doctor Dr. Harvey is an affectionate and elderly lady in the same medical group of gynae doctors. I would like to thank her for having conducted the surgery. Post-surgery today, my skin after 6 weeks shows no signs of infections or complications.


Produce bathroom with ice cubes- com'on I know you can. At least you should try:

Post surgery, I was on water the entire remaining day. I was still under the effect of anesthesia and oblivion to the fact where was I. What did my bed look like and such other stupid details. Per what medical books say in this condition, the attending nurse gave me a cup of ice cubes to quench mt thirst saying I was incapable to drink water. On the contrary, for the next several hours, every 15 minutes Abhinav patiently would pour in my mouth a sip of water. ANything more than one sip was was causing me discomfort in my tummy.

Again per medical text, it was highly essential for me to produce a high volume of bathroom (which post surgery was also now being monitored), to be able to start other fluids and for my speedy recovery soon. Abhinav’s patience helped. The nurses were impressed at the amount of bathroom I was producing. The two of us were obviously in no mood to ask the nurse how could ever a patient generate enough of it with only small cups of ice cubes. They were after all doing what the doctors had asked them to do.

Post operation my 2-3 days in the hospital were however relatively peaceful. I could not walk, sit, stand for the first week, but all that was normal. The following week, I was finally able to distinguish two types of pain. A faint pain in the 4 inch long incision, and a more prominent pain perhaps near the fallopian tube. In the post operation visits to the clinic, I was not allowed to meet or talk to Dr. Harvey. It was even in vain to leave voice mails to her. One day when she did finally get to me, she expressed her unawareness of my trying to reach her all these days. In the mean time Lucia and Dr. Judy had been paying least attention to this other more severe pain in me.

Four weeks passed and there is blood and puss in the incision for the 1st time:
I went back to Lucia for consultation who as usual neither had an explanation for my old pain nor for this new problem. She sent me back advising me to apply hot packs. At home while applying the first hot pack, I called up mom and Dr. Suman. Both seem to confirm it was an infection and that applying hot packs when blood is coming might be catastrophic.

In the course of the next three days, it took me several frantic phone calls to get another gynea to see me ( you bet I was not exagerating in lesson two. Did you know when I tried to take a second opinion from another doc Dr. Friele I was told to wait for 6-8 weeks before that could be possible), a visit to my physician, and finally six hours of wait at Dr. Judy’s clinic. I was at the edge of my patience and I was finally seen by Dr. Judy and barged at her telling that my physician is not legally authorized to give me antibiotics for this infection in my incision. Why is my treatment being delayed, since past four days.

Practising since twenty years? Is that really 'real' about you?
After this, I am actually forced to think whether Dr. Judy or her nurse have ever seen any patient in their entire carriers. I got no answer from her. However she obliged me by taking a second opinion form another co-doc in the same group of gynaes. I had not seen this doc ever before, but the only question this new doc asked me was whether I had stitches or staples. While I answered, she quickly went through my report and confirmed that the knot of the stitch was dissolving (which was also the correct time for it to dissolve) which is why this bleeding happened. Getting a logic which my brain told me could be true, I accepted the rationale. The next day the bleeding stopped too.

After she left, Dr. Judy tried to make up for her incompetencies. For the delayed pain, I was suggested physiotherapy. After much confusion on about my treatment, and after 6 phone calls, I got my first appointment with the physiotherapist after 4 days.

With no choice, I followed her advise. and went to Apple Therapists (at 6th and Union) hoping this would not create any further complications to my extended situation. As I went, there were tons of doubts in my mind about heading to her advise. Today’s science in spite of all its huge technological advances in the medical field doesn’t leave me with many choices to choose from. Two sittings at the therapists, and I could see my self improving. Thank God, Dr. Judy, for once in her life was right.

Hoping for a health problem free world:
It had been a tough journey with Dr. Judy and Lucia. It always hard for me to believe any human can call an allopathic doctor a Bhagwan (Hindi for God), for my dad’s patients did call him that. My dad himself being a surgeon (who was never able to cure at least any of my day to day ailments) and my mom a self made (non-practicing) homeopath (who without formal training or knowledge never failed to cure me of them), I no doubt since childhood have never had faith in allopathic way of treatment or the western philosophy of medical practice. I firmly believe that if we had highly skilled auyurvedic scholars and practitioners today, allopathy would have died long back. I continue to pray that this dream of mine some day comes true. For the incident that took place in my life, as Dr. Suman said; I know soon I will forget as one long bad dream.

Om Sarvesham swasthir bhavatu (May auspiciousness be unto all)

Sarvesham shantir bhavatu (May peace be unto all)

Sarvesham poornam bhavatu (May fullness be unto all)

Sarvesham mangalam bhavatu (May goodness be unto all)

Sarve bhavantu sukinaha (May everyone be happy)

Sarve santu niramiyaha (May everyone be without affliction)

Sarve bhadrani pashyantu (May everyone see only goodness)

Ma kashchit dukha bhak bhavet (Let none be the victim of suffering)

Om